Results 1 to 10 of 10
  1. #1
    Banned.

    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,751
    BG Level
    7
    FFXI Server
    Carbuncle
    WoW Realm
    Trollbane

    YOU THINK YOU'RE HOT SHIT?

    It was a hot summer day and I was in my workout room benching 1200 pounds. My abs were flexing and girls within a 10 mile radius were getting wet. Once I was done with my daily 32 hour workout I called one of the bitches I know, Jessica. She is really damn hot and looks like a supermodel. SO I got into my Lamborghini Gallardo and reved it up to 40,000 RPM (this is an Italian import with special engine system). I got onto the freeway near my house and threw it into 8th gear, I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier. As I was flooring it on the freeway like a badass, Jessica called me and said she wanted me to fuck her. So be it.

    I came to a full stop from 700 mph in front of her house. These Ferrari’s have top notch brakes, you know. So she gets out of the house and walks up to my Bugatti and starts eyeballing my dick. I could tell she was staring at it because when I looked at her I noticed she was looking at my dick. Booya.

    Flash forward 10 minutes later. My 30 inch dick is going inside of her VAGINA, hitting them walls. I’m holding her entire body up with my left pinky as I’m fucking her and she has 30,000 orgasms. She looks me in the eyes and she says “harder.” V-TEC just kicked in, yo. I blow my load so hard she falls off my dick. There had to have been about two pints of cum everywhere. People say I cum like a pornstar, I wouldn’t disagree with them.

  2. #2
    2k for handjobs is a deal yo
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    764
    BG Level
    5

    i got wet reading this

  3. #3
    Banned.

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    15,501
    BG Level
    9
    FFXIV Character
    Patricia Lanvaldear
    FFXIV Server
    Sargatanas

    sexy

  4. #4
    Banned.

    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    3,083
    BG Level
    7
    FFXI Server
    Shiva

    i had some mini rage there

  5. #5
    Title: "HUBBLE GOTCHU!" (without the quotes, of course [and without "(without the quotes, of course)", of course], etc)
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    3,141
    BG Level
    7

    I just got out of the shower with my bitch. She's 90 pounds, 5'3 and the has the body of a goddess. All you know about is sandworm and ixion. Did I fuck my bitch in the shower just a minute ago? I bench 240 pounds now and do 2,500 sit-ups a day. When I walk down the street I can smell your girlfriend's pussy getting wet. She wants to fuck a boss, not a chump change coward like yourself. All you got is FFXI. You play that shit, imma be playing with my girls tits in the club.

  6. #6
    Chram
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    2,567
    BG Level
    7

    Quote Originally Posted by Colenzo View Post
    It was a hot summer day and I was in my workout room benching 1200 pounds. My abs were flexing and girls within a 10 mile radius were getting wet. Once I was done with my daily 32 hour workout I called one of the bitches I know, Jessica. She is really damn hot and looks like a supermodel. SO I got into my Lamborghini Gallardo and reved it up to 40,000 RPM (this is an Italian import with special engine system). I got onto the freeway near my house and threw it into 8th gear, I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier. As I was flooring it on the freeway like a badass, Jessica called me and said she wanted me to fuck her. So be it.

    I came to a full stop from 700 mph in front of her house. These Ferrari’s have top notch brakes, you know. So she gets out of the house and walks up to my Bugatti and starts eyeballing my dick. I could tell she was staring at it because when I looked at her I noticed she was looking at my dick. Booya.

    Flash forward 10 minutes later. My 30 inch dick is going inside of her VAGINA, hitting them walls. I’m holding her entire body up with my left pinky as I’m fucking her and she has 30,000 orgasms. She looks me in the eyes and she says “harder.” V-TEC just kicked in, yo. I blow my load so hard she falls off my dick. There had to have been about two pints of cum everywhere. People say I cum like a pornstar, I wouldn’t disagree with them.

    http://i28.tinypic.com/1623zis.jpg

  7. #7
    Sea Torques
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    632
    BG Level
    5
    FFXI Server
    Bismarck

    Yo Dawg, I'm really happy for you and i'm gonna let you finish but...

    fuck it.

  8. #8
    E. Body
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    2,412
    BG Level
    7

    Quote Originally Posted by Magnakai View Post
    butt fuck it.
    hey man, you said said it

  9. #9
    Banned.

    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,751
    BG Level
    7
    FFXI Server
    Carbuncle
    WoW Realm
    Trollbane

    fucking pussies

  10. #10
    Banned.

    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,751
    BG Level
    7
    FFXI Server
    Carbuncle
    WoW Realm
    Trollbane

    seriously

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