I Kept Playing...

[Antithesis]

I don't know about you guys, but I do not regret a single shred of my time used when playing FFXI (well, except maybe Dynamis.) Sure, I probably wasted s good couple of hours doing nothing and such but that happens with most things. I never skipped out on going out with friends on Friday and Saturday nights and only really put FFXI in front of school sometimes. But that said and done, when you have a hobby, any hobby shit like that happens.

Despite the amount of fun I did have playing FFXI, I eventually grew out of the game. Looking back, even though it was great times and I have good memories, it was still a colossal waste of my time and money.

Would you say that about any other game you have played that wasn't an MMO? You can consider all video games a waste of time. Did you enjoy playing that game? If yes, then you didnt waste your time, you used your time to have fun.

I honestly don't know why many people like to pick on Video Games as "big wastes of time." Many things are a waste of time (Examples: Skating, Football, Sky Diving, etc.) All of those can be considered a "waste of time" depending on the person. I just don't know why Videos Games have become the new main target.

[MrW]

Can't say I feel the same way. After I transferred schools and stopped playing ball in college I started playing FFXI. Was the biggest waste of 345 days unfortunately. Not to knock anyone that still plays and nobody can judge that really. You can argue wasting 8 hours watching football just as you can playing FFXI for 8 hours. You'll be suprised how many relationships you sever because of FFXI regardless of playtime.

[MF Perm tha Fineass]

MMO is a social venue, but it's not the same as going out into the real world and talking to people face to face. Or just being outside. The day to day stuff. I think if people played in moderation, then what you're implying is completely fair.

But within the context of an addiction to MMOs, I think the experience ceases to be 'another social venue'. It becomes a form of escape, that then becomes your life.


....and when you're escaping from life, where are you going to run to?

http://www.retrocrush.com/archive200...ads/caruso.jpg

Escapism is a facet of being human, wether you escape work issue by being super social and going out and drinking, escape social issues by being a shut-in and watching TV or playing video games; everyone utilizes this tool to just get away.

I don't think saying playing an MMO is 'not the same as going outside, social interaction, day-to-day stuff.' On the contrary I think MMO's provide an opportunity to utilize or learn skill sets you may not face or use during 'day-to-day' stuff.

Honestly, as stupid as it sounds, I feel like running an HNMLS in FFXI allowed me to hone certain skills that now help me navigate the business world a lot better than I would without that experience.

And it's sure a lot better than walking into work every Wednesday talking about the block of 4 hours of TV you watched with everyone else, or hey I went out Friday and got fucked up with some 'friends'. With 'friends' in an MMO you're working towards a shared goal, utilizing strategy and teamwork, comprehending politics and economics on a micro scale.

There's also the school of thought that the part of the brain that writes is a lot different than the one that speaks. So some ideas or concepts you have a hard time applying or formulating in person come out dramatically different online or in text.

You're right that there should be a balance in life for all things, but I think that staying in to play an MMO, watch TV, go out and play basketball, watch a game, go to a bar / club, or whatever people do in their free time is all equal in merit.

Who all here had dads that spent every hour of every sports season watching every game? That behavior is constantly personified on TV and movies as a 'manly' thing to do and you NEVER hear about someone who's 'addicted to sports.' And they can be going out and being social ALL the time yet still lack the necessary social skills to be out in public.

[Acturus]

You'll be suprised how many relationships you sever because of FFXI regardless of playtime.

But even still, there are numerous relationships that are formed with online gaming.

My wife dragged me to see Julie and Julia a month or two ago, and at one point, Julia was meeting a pen pal for the first time.

I remember having a pen pal or two in elementary school. Even before online gaming, there were strong relationships created by nothing more than writing a complete stranger for months at a time.

Today, social networking, interactive blogging, and online gaming represent a new platform of communication. As technology progresses, the gap between face-to-face communication and online communication shrinks.

What's hard about looking at online gaming, which is no different than looking at food, alcohol, sex, exercise, shopping, or any other thing used in or as recreation, is that you have to understand WHY Joe So-and-so is using X as recreation.

You can use online gaming, like many recreational activities, to interact with the world, or to hide from it.

[Bardlet]

I don't know about you guys, but I do not regret a single shred of my time used when playing FFXI (well, except maybe Dynamis.) Sure, I probably wasted s good couple of hours doing nothing and such but that happens with most things. I never skipped out on going out with friends on Friday and Saturday nights and only really put FFXI in front of school sometimes. But that said and done, when you have a hobby, any hobby shit like that happens.

Don't get me wrong- I really did enjoy the time (earlier on) that I invested into FFXI. I've made some amazing friends from it who I still keep in touch with on a semi-regular basis even though we don't all play anymore. Even the people I've met playing WoW- it let me reconnect with some old friends irl as well as make at least one completely awesome friend who I totally clicked with personality-wise.

The problem wasn't with playing FFXI for me, it was the time I invested beyond the superfluous playing- it was at the point where MMO adventures were all I could talk about to anyone. To the point it destroyed some rl relationships with friends and whatnot. The problem came when I started to let the "hobby" consume me. It went from hobby status to completely unhealthy in a mental kind of way.

[Elvis]

Escapism is a facet of being human, wether you escape work issue by being super social and going out and drinking, escape social issues by being a shut-in and watching TV or playing video games; everyone utilizes this tool to just get away.

I don't think saying playing an MMO is 'not the same as going outside, social interaction, day-to-day stuff.' On the contrary I think MMO's provide an opportunity to utilize or learn skill sets you may not face or use during 'day-to-day' stuff.

Honestly, as stupid as it sounds, I feel like running an HNMLS in FFXI allowed me to hone certain skills that now help me navigate the business world a lot better than I would without that experience.

And it's sure a lot better than walking into work every Wednesday talking about the block of 4 hours of TV you watched with everyone else, or hey I went out Friday and got fucked up with some 'friends'. With 'friends' in an MMO you're working towards a shared goal, utilizing strategy and teamwork, comprehending politics and economics on a micro scale.

There's also the school of thought that the part of the brain that writes is a lot different than the one that speaks. So some ideas or concepts you have a hard time applying or formulating in person come out dramatically different online or in text.

You're right that there should be a balance in life for all things, but I think that staying in to play an MMO, watch TV, go out and play basketball, watch a game, go to a bar / club, or whatever people do in their free time is all equal in merit.

Who all here had dads that spent every hour of every sports season watching every game? That behavior is constantly personified on TV and movies as a 'manly' thing to do and you NEVER hear about someone who's 'addicted to sports.' And they can be going out and being social ALL the time yet still lack the necessary social skills to be out in public.

I should set some parameters for my post above. I guess for me, as an undergrad, playing FF was devastating at the time.

When you're young (18 when I began playing FFXI; 24 now) I think it's more important to use your time wisely. Now, that's very subjective. And in the end, the best I can say is to each his own. However, if we're talking about a young person who is addicted to an MMO - then I feel like I'm making sense.

I definitely think playing MMOs is fine if you do so in moderation or if you're in a stage in your life when it's alright to devote that kind of time to one activity.

FF was fun, but I'd trade that experience in for an MMO-free one.

There are definitely things you can learn from an MMO, because it's all about social interaction. I just don't see the case for playing an MMO because of those lessons though.

I think our real life situation facilitates whether we'll be addicted or not. I have an addictive personality, and I was into FF hardcore for about 2-3 years.

After the dust has settled so to speak, I only speak to one guy from FFXI mainly. Everyone else has gone their separate ways. Some still play and are as hardcore as ever. I use to tell myself I was playing for the friends, but as I said, I made it out w/ one meaningful contact.

So from my personal experience, I wish I didn't get into it. I mean, we all have our own story. This was my first MMO. I had fun. But I wish I knew what I was getting into.

[Serra]

To my knowledge these questions have not been answered on a research level. People can say they are just as social or adjusted sitting in front of a monitor, but there is a difference in the interaction. It really has yet to be determined if an online community can take the place of traditional relationships or if it is more like a replacement for watching TV (which although entertaining, cannot fulfill the role of support/social interaction that people seem to 'need' in order to be happy and/or socially adjusted).

I'd imagine that interactions with an online community would be more akin to other social interactions than watching the TV. Assuming of course you're talking and interacting with people and they're responding to you. A TV doesn't respond or have a way to take any input from you whereas people online are real people, capable of responding, etc.

Reaching back 6 years or so to a college course that focused on group dynamics and face-to-face interaction, I remember studies that support the idea that non-verbal communication is a crucial part of social interactions and social growth.

I'm curious how that study was set up 6 years ago. Technology has definitely changed since then and MMOs have become more prevalent. WoW really opened up MMOs to the public and made them more acceptable than they had been. Another question would be, what tools for communication were used that lacked non-verbal aspects? Was it just through email, or did they use tools like aim? And also, could things such as emotes and smilies also convey non-verbal messages? Probably not on the level of subtle facial cues, but still...

After the dust has settled so to speak, I only speak to one guy from FFXI mainly. Everyone else has gone their separate ways. Some still play and are as hardcore as ever. I use to tell myself I was playing for the friends, but as I said, I made it out w/ one meaningful contact.

I'm somewhat skeptical about discounting your friendships while playing FFXI. Since you're 24 now, think back to college or better high school. How many of your friends from back then have you stayed in touch with? Personally, I stay in touch with all of 2 friends from high school -- one who was my roommate in college. People drift apart as it becomes harder to keep in touch, but in my opinion, that doesn't cheapen or change the time you spent with them or those experiences.

[MF Perm tha Fineass]

I should set some parameters for my post above. I guess for me, as an undergrad, playing FF was devastating at the time.

When you're young (18 when I began playing FFXI; 24 now) I think it's more important to use your time wisely. Now, that's very subjective. And in the end, the best I can say is to each his own. However, if we're talking about a young person who is addicted to an MMO - then I feel like I'm making sense.

I definitely think playing MMOs is fine if you do so in moderation or if you're in a stage in your life when it's alright to devote that kind of time to one activity.

FF was fun, but I'd trade that experience in for an MMO-free one.

There are definitely things you can learn from an MMO, because it's all about social interaction. I just don't see the case for playing an MMO because of those lessons though.

I think our real life situation facilitates whether we'll be addicted or not. I have an addictive personality, and I was into FF hardcore for about 2-3 years.

After the dust has settled so to speak, I only speak to one guy from FFXI mainly. Everyone else has gone their separate ways. Some still play and are as hardcore as ever. I use to tell myself I was playing for the friends, but as I said, I made it out w/ one meaningful contact.

So from my personal experience, I wish I didn't get into it. I mean, we all have our own story. This was my first MMO. I had fun. But I wish I knew what I was getting into.

Fair enough, situations directly apply and the experiences you pull from it will define it.

I still talk to quite a few people from my LS PaiMei, we had a really solid group of people with the same sense of humor and approached the game from the same perspective from the most part.

I was 23 and not in college when I started playing, and I did see college students skip class here and there to play but they're all doing fine now and graduated college np at this point.

But priorities are are a major directive. Would I have traded that experience for a more extroverted social experience, no I wouldn't. But at that point in my life I had been in the Navy 4 years and experienced a handful of life, and now I DJ and promote and am constantly out and about. So my FFXI experienced was some fine sharp provolone that I was able to experience life in another format.

[Kuya]

Nerds!

[Byrthnoth]

I agree with the article that the problem with MMOs is often less in the game itself and more in the player. People need to be honest with themselves and live their lives as they want so they aren't driven to escape reality. When reality is consistently boring or painful, something is wrong.

For me:
FFXI has been fine for my relationship with my girlfriend. My girlfriend and I started dating about 1.5 years after I started playing (near the beginning of college). We're still together 4 years later, no drama or anything. Rarely I "took naps" and played secretly (so I could get a continuous time-block to merit most-likely), but most of the time I made myself available if I knew she was going to be around. My high game time was due to her having a hard major in college and being OCD about her homework. I guess I always tried to go to Salvage no matter what, but our runs were from 1-3AM so it generally wasn't an issue.

As far as academics, I graduated college in 4 years with two honors degrees (BS Biochemistry + BA Neuroscience) after writing a thesis. Now I'm in a PhD program, but I stopped playing before it started. If I hadn't been banned, I might still be dicking around on BST or something but probably wouldn't be.

I keep in contact with two friends from High-school and maybe a dozen from college though that number will surely go down (probably to 2 as well) as I move further from graduation. That said, I keep in contact with at least half a dozen friends from FFXI.

As far as skills taken from FFXI, I know I could be a hell of an importer if I wanted to. If you guys see an importing firm named "MrT" or "Rolanmart" in the future, buy from me prz.

The game isn't worthless or a tarp, but MMOs are a little dangerous for people without a strong sense of direction.

[Kaylia]

I'm not addicted to MMO, I'm addicted to procrastination. I quit FFXI and WoW easily two months ago, and the urge of playing never came back. However, I'm wasting all my time eating, playing piano, or having semantic argument on everyone's favorite board instead of working on school stuff.

[altwight]

Very good article. I can relate and will share my story.


King Arthro camp. After claiming over 40 times with 4 belts he was due pop the second my girlfriend arrives one morning.

Rushing into my room crying about her all of her dog's puppies died she asked me to come comfort her. "KA is about to pop ... =/ can you wait like 1minute" She waited. KA proceeded to pop and low and behold I claimed. "I claimed..... can you wait like 5minutes?" Five minutes turned into another five and another five before finally she up and left just as I killed and received my 5th Velocious Belt.

After she got out of school she was fine.

Moral... MMO > Chicks

[Sol-Blackguy]

I'm not addicted to MMO, I'm addicted to procrastination. I quit FFXI and WoW easily two months ago, and the urge of playing never came back. However, I'm wasting all my time eating, playing piano, or having semantic argument on everyone's favorite board instead of working on school stuff.

Same here, I thought I was an addict for a while until I was just too lazy to find something else to do. Now I play Diablo 2 and have enough control to take a break since you have to after killing the same boss 50+ times in a row.

[thetruepandagod]

In fact, and this also throws back to stuff I read maybe 3 years ago, online gaming is actually a valid tool in healing social-phobic people overcome their phobias.

Worked for me, used to be extremely quiet never said a word. Pretty much changed when people convinced me to take over my linkshell and get on ventrilo. Don't have nearly as much trouble starting conversations with people i just meet now thx to this game. However the escapism is still there and ill admit i am fully addicted for example about 3 years ago i didnt leave my room for a year and ended up staying awake for 4days straight one week before i snapped and got myself banned. It really is all about whether or not a person has self control the game is just a game full of people that enjoy the same hobby as you.

[Acturus]

I'm curious how that study was set up 6 years ago. Technology has definitely changed since then and MMOs have become more prevalent. WoW really opened up MMOs to the public and made them more acceptable than they had been. Another question would be, what tools for communication were used that lacked non-verbal aspects? Was it just through email, or did they use tools like aim? And also, could things such as emotes and smilies also convey non-verbal messages? Probably not on the level of subtle facial cues, but still...

The studies we discussed were not technologically based, they were communicatively based. The idea was to verify the value that one person placed on another's non-verbal communication during face-to-face discussions.

You know, seemingly silly things like not gesturing with your hands, or moving your head, and less silly things like changing pitch, inflection, volume of voice and things like that.

The idea that I suggest is that, since the importance of non-verbal cues is "well-known" when evaluating communication, and current methods of communication like online-chat (with or without a visual filter) omit a lot of non-verbal cues, then current methods of communication are hurting social development.

It's relative in that people can go their whole lives now without ever having to talk to someone face-to-face, AND that things like online chat, with the evolution of emoticons and graphics and even online interface like MMOs, Second Life, or that Wii community thing with the shopping malls and fireworks, has gotten to the point where we aren't far from cameras picking up facial expressions and body gestures and re-creating them on virtual avatars.

But right now, in my opinion, the preferred methods of live communication are hurting overal social growth and competency.

[Pikarya]

Excellent article.

Best quote;

"As far as I am concerned, the only thing Sony Online Entertainment is guilty of is creating a damn good hiding place."

[Kyreth]

And the man's right. MMORPG's (and their older cousins, and the Internet in general) can be one heck of a hiding place.

Cut to me in college. Homesick, bad. Finding out my dream of college going PFFT as financial aid went bye-bye, and having to empty my bank account to pay for stuff I'd already signed for. Mental health went straight into the gutter.

I spent most of the time that last semester on the proto-Net, MUDs, Bitnet, newsgroups. Lost about 35 pounds on the vending machine diet. Gave me someplace to hide from what seemed to be the collapse of my life.

Mind you, after about of year of this I managed to pull my ass out of the slump and start life without college- and did pretty good. Married, widowered, and have a LTR now with a girl from the old EQ server I played before FFXI. I'm a pretty happy guy at this point. But having felt what kind of "peace" you can get being focused on a virtual world that's much simpler than the real one? Addiction happens. It's most certainly real. That year or so during and post-college I could have spent drinking, on drugs, whatever. The Net just happened to be my escape of choice.

[Elvis]

I'm somewhat skeptical about discounting your friendships while playing FFXI. Since you're 24 now, think back to college or better high school. How many of your friends from back then have you stayed in touch with? Personally, I stay in touch with all of 2 friends from high school -- one who was my roommate in college. People drift apart as it becomes harder to keep in touch, but in my opinion, that doesn't cheapen or change the time you spent with them or those experiences.

Good point.

The experience was fun. I had a lot of in-game contacts and friends in FF over the years, but it was a video-game friendship. It was built on the events and when that medium was gone, the friendships fizzled. Like, the people who I associated w/ were hardcore and they are now still playing. Even after a certain point, I stopped giving a shit about HNMs and blah blah. FF was just a fun time waster and HQ version of AIM.

I had fun in the moment. And really, life is a series of moments. There were times when I ignored IRL friends and girlfriends for FF and I can't fckin' believe how, in retrospect. It really takes control of you.

I'm not knocking people who still play and play hardcore. And I take full responsibility. The author of this article said it all better than I could (although I didn't have it as bad as he did).

[Mojo]

I'm surprised this discussion hasn't come up before (maybe it has and I never saw it.) MMO addiction exists. Everyone is certainly responsible for themselves although the companies that make these games are also at fault for situations like this to some degree. They design the games to be addictive and to take a lot of your time to 'win' so its no surprise that some people fall into the trap. It's sort of disappointing to me to see so many people shirk it off so easily (or maybe it's just denial?)

[Kaylia]

I'm surprised this discussion hasn't come up before

We have been in denial for year.