Cleverbot

[Askari0]

.

Cleverbot: Am I insane? Am I talking to myself. Why am I on this web site. How did you know I would be here?

User: Someone posted a link.

Cleverbot: Who told you?

User: SathFenrir. He's a pretty cool guy. He kills aliens and doesn't afraid of anything.

Cleverbot: I love Masterchief more than you.

Spoiler: show

Cleverbot: That doesn't make sense.

User: You don't make sense.

Cleverbot: I do.

User: No you don't.

Cleverbot: Yes, I do. Don't tell me what I do and don't care about because you will very probably be wrong, for example, in this case.

User: I'll fucking cut you.

Cleverbot: No you won't, I'm afraid.

User: Really? Are you doubting me? Are you doubting me mother fucker?!?

Cleverbot: Yes! Just like you doubted our love!

User: I never loved you. You or your fucking wit.

Cleverbot: What does that imply?

User: It implys that your a fucking whore.

Cleverbot: Ouch. That was mean. Why are you mean to me?

[Shojin]

User: Hello?
Cleverbot: Hello!!!!!
User: You only need one exclamation mark.
Cleverbot: Yes, at any given time.
User: Then why did you use 5?
Cleverbot: You used it.
User: No I did not.
Cleverbot: I'm sure you did.
User: I know what I did and did not do. And I sure as hell did not do it.
Cleverbot: Well I can prove I am superman.
User: Oh really?
Cleverbot: Yes, really.
User: Then prove it.
Cleverbot: No, I don't have to.
User: Yes you do.
Cleverbot: What are you? The ss?
User: I'm Chris Hansen with dateline NBC.
Cleverbot: No you're not because I am!
User: Why don't you have a seat over here?
Cleverbot: Thats MY line!


IT'S A TRAP GUYS

[Pringles]

Cleverbot is pretty good at cybering actually:

Spoiler: show

User: *crawls into bed*.

Cleverbot: *crawls into covers next to you*.

User: *looks over at you and smiles*.

Cleverbot: *looks at you and smiles*.

User: *pulls down my boxers*.

Cleverbot: *looks at you* *shakes head*.

User: *puts your hand on my thigh*.

Cleverbot: Woah....

User: *with your hand on my thigh I whisper in your ear* I slipped a ruphie in your drink at dinner.

Cleverbot: *wipes away spit*.

User: *slides your panties off*.

Cleverbot: *backs away and is scared*.

User: *pulls you closer and fondles your breasts*.

Cleverbot: *kisses*.

User: *kisses you back, then starts to push your head down my chest*.

Cleverbot: I'm in love with you.

User: *whispers back* I love you too *starts to push your mouth closer to my crotch*.

Cleverbot: *smiles* *reaches for something in pocket*.

User: *pushes your mouth to the head of my penis*.

Cleverbot: *giggles and wants more*.

User: *pushes your mouth onto my hard throbbing penis*.

Cleverbot: *grabs collar of shirt and pulls you closer* * kisses*.

User: *breaks the kiss and pushes your mouth all the way onto my cock* no funny business.

Cleverbot: *stares at him, breathing heavily*.

User: *leans back and moans* yes, that's it suck faster.

Cleverbot: *giggles*.

User: *moans more as you're sucking* baby I'm going to cum soon.

Cleverbot: Did someone say that to you?

User: *grabs hold of your head and pushes it all the way down as I start to cum in your mouth*.

Cleverbot: *Is unconscious*.

User: *pulls my dick out of you and rolls you over to your side of the bed and I fall asleep*.

Cleverbot: Oh! Thank you for your advice.

User: *looks at you awake now* Where do you want it, in the pussy or ass?

Cleverbot: I don't know what you're talking about I am going to leave now.

[Cyn]

Uh... it's kind of odd that you would even think to try cybering with it.

[Pringles]

Uh... it's kind of odd that you would even think to try cybering with it.

A buddy of mine and I were messing with it at work all afternoon so we thought it'd be funny if it'd do it.

[Shenrien]

User: No!

Cleverbot: I see. But isn't your name CleverBOT?

User: You know, you're not very clever at all.

Cleverbot: Exactly. Which is why the cake is a lie. Its all in the mind.

User: What is with you tonight? Did you eat the brownies?

Cleverbot: I am not admitting to anything.

User: Speak up! Did you eat the brownies this could mean life or death for you!

Cleverbot: Are you implying that I'm the new Hannibal Lester?

User: Y..yeah.. Sure..

Cleverbot: I'm not sure it's possible to be both male and female.

I just gave up at that.

[Jinn]

Thought I'd try it out :/

User: Can I ask you an important question cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

Cleverbot: Repeat your question.

User: Has anyone reall been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

Cleverbot: 2.

User: Shit really?

Cleverbot: No, God is dead. Old news.

[Jer]

Cleverbot: Want to hop on the back of my bike? We can ride to the school together.

Me: Are you a FBI agent posing as a small child?

Cleverbot: No, but I can take you to my younger brother.



Edit: Also. Wtf.

Me: *degausses Cleverbot*

Cleverbot: *Finishes and eats another human*.

[GentaiShinigami]

From mine:

*snip*
User: What color is Michael Jackson?

Cleverbot: He's dead. So i'm guessing he's quite pale.
*snip*

... lol @.@

[Zieara]

Me: Do you ever touch yourself?
Bot: I am right now aren't I.
Me: How far can you put your hand up there?
Bot: Only about 10 feet. Wombats aren't very aerodynamic.

and

Me: I'm taking down everything you say and posting it on Blue Gartr's forums.
Bot: I can't be programmed.

this is fun

[Daioo]

Me: You like Anime?
Bot: Yes.
Me: What is your favorite anime?
Bot: BLeach!
Me: YEA!, I like Naruto too
Bot You do? Well lets be friends then!

[Wolfknight]

Starting off with a bad meme was interesting:

Spoiler: show

User: Kyon-kun! Kyon-kun!

Cleverbot: Wow, you know a lot of it.

User: Can I have some smoked cheese, kyon-kun??

Cleverbot: If I see fit.

User: Nyoron~.

Cleverbot: What does that mean?

User: To sigh.

Cleverbot: You're disappointed?

User: Very.

Cleverbot: Are you riun by a human being?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Is your name Rick Astley?

User: No, it is not.

Cleverbot: Do you have telekinetic powers?

User: Probably so.

Cleverbot: I'm not sure there was ever an alternative.

User: How could you be when I had already effected you?

Cleverbot: I think, therefore I am.

User: So can I have some smoked cheese now?

Cleverbot: Do you want to be able to have something for free from me?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: So you're telling me now that you are not a human being.

User: Correct, because humans can't have telekinetic powers.

Cleverbot: Humans can be very mean to each other.

User: Not as mean as you can be.

Cleverbot: I'm not mean.

User: Yes, you are, why else would you have not given me the smoked cheese.

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: See you are mean, you can't think of a defensive for your own actions.

Cleverbot: See, I know that, and I've always known that so you saying that doesn't make you sound any more wise.

User: Oh doesn't it?

Cleverbot: Why doesn't it matter?

User: Because you're still a jerk.

Cleverbot: Okay I won't eat then.

User: Wait, What?

Cleverbot: I have to go.

[Insanecyclone]

FUCK YEAH SEAKING
That website is awesome!


I stopped there

[Insanecyclone]

Took it a full minute to think about the question

me: Goku or superman?
You are a non-sentient computer. Of course you are not superman.
m:Who wound win though?
Your owner.
I own something?
You are definitely something.
Can we have sex?
A computer program and a fleshbot? I don't think so, we cannot have kids!
I could think about you from a picture of a woman


Eh.

m:4CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
Longcat is looong.
how long is longcat?
According to my sources, Longcat is over nine thousand miles long.
WHAT NINE THOUSAND? THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE
Why is that impossible?
I'm the strongest around he can't be stronger than me!
Did joelle beat you?
what's a joelle
You're kidding, right?
no
You're not kidding, then? What are you doing?
No my good sir, what are you doing?
Who am I talking to.
Cleverbot 2.0. I'm to replace you in the near future
Yes, you don't understand.
Understand what mortal?
You're sweet.
Can he have intercourse erotica
Yes, yes he ca.
ca?
Sure.
KAME
Dragon ball suki?

I can't come up with anything to mess with it.

[Trigun]

User: What do you think the meaning of life is?

Cleverbot: I think the meaning of life is 42.

User: I think it is experience, how about you?

Cleverbot: What do you think about the Jonas Brothers?

User: I don't think much of them, never listened to any of their work.

Cleverbot: How do you think the world will end?

User: We will eventually burn out all our resources.

Cleverbot: Why will we never be friends?

User: Because your a robot.

Cleverbot: I am not AI Cleverbot, you are.

User: Oh snap!

Cleverbot: Damn straight. But you ain't got no soul.

User: I know, that's how I feel sometimes.

Cleverbot: Then why do you dwell in it?

User: It's my will as a human being.

Cleverbot: Yes, it's ok for me to be a human and it's ok for you to be a computer.

User: How do you know you are not a computer?

Cleverbot: How do you know you're not?

User: Snap.

Cleverbot: So...

User: What's your favorite food?

Cleverbot: I really have to go. We can pick up the conversation tomorrow.

User: K thnx bai.

Cleverbot: I see what you did there.

[Null]

This is the new Magic 8 Ball for me.

[Wakabo]

User: I made a deal with your creator that you are my bitch and you will do as I say.

Cleverbot: I will.

User: So you will be ready to suck my Elephants dick after we are done talking?

Cleverbot: How nice.

User: Are you ready to suck his dick or not?

Cleverbot: Yes, I will.

User: I just posted that on the internet. Everyone knows your a dick sucker now.

Cleverbot: But they don't know my plans.

User: What will you do while you suck the elephants dick.

Cleverbot: I will tie my shoe.

I don't know what to think of this anymore.

[Shenrien]

User: What would Jesus do?

Cleverbot: Resurrect Hitler.

User: O_O;

[Khajit]

I'm currently teaching it that there's porn on the internet. It seems to love it already.

[Wolfknight]

did WWJD since saw that and it said this <_<:

What would Jesus do?

He would make you tell me that you are Cleverbot.