Games you have played that make you rage.

[The Stig]

Dear Nintendo:
YOUR COCKSUCKING PRODUCT HAS REDUCED ME TO A GIBBERING MAN-APE WHOSE ONLY RESORT TO DEALING WITH THE ALMIGHTY loving GRIEF IT'S BESTOWED UPON ME IS TO SCREAM AND HURT MYSELF.

Seriously, I am jumping up and down and throwing my poo poo in handfuls at the loving television in some impotent primal effort to get the thing to work. I have been sitting here trying to enjoy your product - YOUR PRODUCT, YOUR GAME, YOUR CONTRACT BETWEEN DEVELOPER AND CONSUMER THAT THE CONSUMER WILL ENJOY YOUR PRODUCT - but instead the drat thing's been crawling out of the console and taking warm shits in my gaping mouth. Swear to god, you should have just added a little door to the console through which a hand pops out and flips me off, because I am insulted that your QA or testers or whatever brainless shitstove three genes short of a monkey FAGNUT signs your games through thought that a person with more than a single loving digit IQ could enjoy Story Mode Chapter 7. INSULTED.

WORK WITH ME HERE: The goal's simple enough! Come in first! Hey, that's fine, it's just like playing the grand loving prix; not a problem! Only deal is your cross-eyed team of tongue-slapping wunderkind decided to give the game every single loving advantage possible TO THE GAME rather than me.

How in the gently caress does Black Shadow - whose car is the heaviest and lamest piece of poo poo next to the Crazy Bear - suddenly become SO loving GOOD that he can stay in first without using a drop of boost? Huh!? Why!? You never see this shithead anywhere near the top loving 20 in a normal race. BUT HO HO HO THIS TIME HE'S MEGA-COCK, THE FASTEST FAGGOT IN THE WORLD. 1.21 GIGAWATTS MARTY, LET'S GO BACK TO THE loving FUTURE.

But it's not just Black Shadow with the magical powers, it's the entire loving lineup of racers! THEY'RE ALL FASTER THAN YOU. AND DON'T REQUIRE ANY BOOST.

But but but I of course, am still driving some piece of poo poo hamster-powered jalopy who guzzles it's entire energy bar in no less than four loving boosts! Add to this the entire course just got shitted on by some retarded space tiki volacano god and you've got a course full of hazards that'll drain at least 1/4 of your energy bar JUST BECAUSE IT CAN. WHOOPIE.

HURRR, you say. THAT'S JUST THE CHALLENGE. IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE EASY. Well gently caress that noise, you lopsided frankenfaced fuckfurter.

Tell me, please, why does the GAME have to win? Huh? What happens when the game wins and I lose? Is there some huge loving kegger waiting for it when it gets done? Is there money involved? Or perhaps the motives are more sinister. Maybe the game's family is being held hostage by another game and that game has it's cock in F-Zero's wife's mouth and he's holding a cell phone up to her and F-Zero can hear her pained moans and cries for help and the rear end in a top hat game then says, "You beat that cock-sucking human, or I'll blow her brains out." I COULD UNDERSTAND THAT. I CAN BE SYMPATHETIC.

It's not any fun if I can't win, you faggots. I want to move on. I want to unlock whatever piece of poo poo clown car you have hidden away from me so I can start racing and get pissed off with that too. When your game prevents me from fully enjoying the product I have bought you have failed in your loving mission to deliver a game. You lose! You break the contract! You contract the gay and loving DIE DIE DIE.

Actually it might be insane but I found Chapter 7 really fun; Chapter 5 on the other hand, although it's all about memory, but you cannot make 1 single mistake or you lose (on Very Hard). However, it's shit that a couple of friends of mine who has collected a godawful amount of trophies/achievements think it's (Chapter 7) really easy. So easy infact, if I see him next I am going to bet £200 ($450+?) to see if he can beat Very Hard mode in 1 evening/night. The idea is I'm hoping that would be enough money for them to go ahead and try as many times to win as possible to provide me a night of lolz. After 1am or so (the deadline), I laugh at their imcompetance....

[Obev]

http://i50.tinypic.com/2j1abnr.gif
Never got past the first level, never mind the second. Controls are horrible.

[miokomioko]

http://www.vgmuseum.com/scans/tg16/01/rtype.jpg

This has me pulling my hair to this day. The original TurboGrafx16 version. Level 4 can eat my ass.

So many times I've pulled out the old frustrating games from my childhood, thinking "I'm older, I'm wiser, I got this shit in the bag." Before you know it, my girlfriend is pissed at me for throwing a controller.

[Julian]

http://www.destructoid.com/elephant/...182-550x-5.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...s/lionking.png

[Tekoa]

I was just about to post about Aladin for the snes too. /slowclap

Fuck that volcano getaway bs.

[Koul]

omg Lion king was so hard as an 12 year old. holy shit. same with that batman game

might get reamed for this but FF4 for the DS pissed me the fuck off. Walk into dungeon and get into a battle with a couple things. they get first strike and use AoEs which rapes everyone. It wouldn't be bad if it happened once in a while buuuuuuuuttttt

also this one was... uughhh

http://www.consoleclassix.com/info_i...creenShot1.jpg

fuuuuuuuuccckkkk this gaaammmmeeeeee. hate it but love it so god damn much

[Hobbes]

I believe I speak for everyone.


http://www.iovideogioco.com/wp-conte...oads-nes21.png

I'm pretty sure this wasn't beaten by anyone until emulators + save states.

[Arew]

2 games come to mind: Assassins Creed 2....FUCKING ASSASSIN'S TOMBS and ...Super mario bros 3 for the NES(Super Mario All stars if you play it on SNES)

There was nothing hard about AC2, and the only hard part about the Assassin's Tomb was one of them a little harder to find than the others. I had them all done as soon as I could access them.

Latest game that made me rage quit is Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2, because EVERYTIME during the Hobgoblin/Venom fight in Africa, it froze at the end of the fight.

[Cjskater]

Latest games I've raged at would be...

Dragons Age: Origins - Fuck you mages, seriously, stunlocked for at least 1min each battle. They aren't even hard to kill, just annoying as fuck.

Final Fantasy XII - First it was the wall then I find White Mousse... holy shit you've got to kidding me. First time I've played it btw and yes I did eventually beat him (after like 2hrs). Edit: Oh and not to mention the generic mobs in that area that pretty much would 1 shot you even though they were the same-ish level.

[Charismatic]

http://i50.tinypic.com/2j1abnr.gif
Never got past the first level, never mind the second. Controls are horrible.

I beat the shit out of that game, it wasn't that bad.
One very hard game was Batman Returns on Sega CD.

Or at least it was hard for me as a kid.

[The Stig]

Any SNK Bosses

[Krazy]

I believe I speak for everyone.


http://www.iovideogioco.com/wp-conte...oads-nes21.png

Beat it once, game over'd on the next level, then threw the cartridge against the wall. >_>

Underwater level in TMNT sucked too, but there was another section I thought was worse. Can't remember what it was though.

[JetEnduro]

Javfaggotry on MW2 MP

[Eversor]

I remember one spot in the NES TMNT game in stage 4 I think it was where you had to go thru the sewers and there were some OMGNERDRAGE jumps you had to make over water. And if you missed it, blam, one less turtle.

I think the furthest I ever made it on that game w/o a Game Genie was the stage after that and it was a video game ass reaming you would never forget.

[Jojothemidget]

The jumping/falling Mechanics on the nes castlevania games where you can fall 8 feet and die...

http://media.giantbomb.com/uploads/0...ia_1_super.jpg

[Sepukku]

Socom II, E-seals tourney.............. enough said.

(even though my clan at the time was probably the most hated in the tourney >.<)

Socom 2 can make a man go mad. So much raging... yet I loved it so much, I could never stop.

[Diamicles]

Am I really that old that no one got/cared about the Battletoads Stage-3 reference?

I got it, I mean, I referenced the original Ninja Gaiden so I know what's up.

Not much else to say about stage 3 though, that hasn't been said in the past ~20 years.

[Shiro]

http://www.online-station.net/_news/...0964_chase.jpg

This fucker.

[arus2001]

The jumping/falling Mechanics on the nes castlevania games where you can fall 8 feet and die...

http://media.giantbomb.com/uploads/0...ia_1_super.jpg

I feel like the bricks you could fall through in Castlevania II were more rage inducing. It's like once you find one, you spend the rest of the game chucking holy water at the floor if ground level or over spikes. In retrospect, I don't think I've actually beaten III ever. Think it's because half the time the game wants to stick you with a shitty partner out of Grant, Alucard, and Sylphia.

Anyway, I'd imagine Ocarina of Time's Water Temple has shortened some lifespans. Getting wtfpwned deep into Lufia's Deep Dungeons can suck. 2's "World's Most Difficult Trick" can get honorable mention if you're not good at those types of puzzles. Some of the stars in Mario 64 were definitely a pain to get. Think it's a 3 stage Albedo fight in Xenosaga II that also consistently kicked my ass. Trying to fucking chase anything fast in the Metroid Primes with the fucking Wiimote. Any part of a Mega Man game that involves insta-kill lasers blocking off a path. Wily in MM7. Any game that has a good rare drop from a rare spawning mob. Practically all of Shining in the Darkness past the first floor.

And many more I'm forgetting.

[dejet]

The Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena

hole game is made of crap.

I even tryed the online play and it has like no one on it. The lag is out of hand.....