how long do you wait before you call?

[Yuri-G]

Do gay people and strait people adhere to the same social conventions of dating? Maybe I'm just not privy to the gay culture, but don't you guys live off of one night stands and thump like wild rabbits?

yes we fuck like rabbits, but we also date. it's pretty much two separate deals entirely. there are guys I'd fuck the night I met them and never talk to them again, and there are guys I wouldn't fuck for months but that's only because I want to get to know them better so we actually have a chance at building a solid relationship.

of course, there are all sorts of middle ground, but dating and sex can usually be separate to some degree. don't straight people have one-night stands?

[Atreides]

Do gay people and strait people adhere to the same social conventions of dating? Maybe I'm just not privy to the gay culture, but don't you guys live off of one night stands and thump like wild rabbits?

well most gays are shapeshifters so the first hour or so of courtship is changing into our animal forms and seeing if those are compatible.

[BunkMonk]

If she's into you, you can't call too soon.
If she's not, doesn't matter anyway.

If she's into you and you wait a few days, she will think you are not as into her and she misread you, and now she has replayed the date in her head 12 times and asked all her friends why you didn't call and they have now all told her what a douche you are for playing games.

You are very wise :3 This is pretty solid advice for anyone else in the situation.

But yeah, if he's already emailed you I'd say you're fine to contact him whenever.

[willriker]

I just call her the next day, if she was interested... shell still be interested. If she was on the fence, fuck it, did you really want to waste the invested time in a chick who wasnt interested to begin with?

If its just sex, well the phonecall prolly doesnt matter anyhow, as youll be bedding her that very night.

[tornfleshofsoul]

When's the next Olympics? yeah, around then. (40yr old Virgin) oh wait..

[willriker]

orz someone beat me to my responce. I hate when that happens. It happened to me in the thread on Unit vectors also.

[vagus]

Personally if a guy called me the day after a date I wouldn't mind. Don't expect me to be all over you though, just make small talk and show you're easy to talk to.

Maybe I'll suck your dick next time I see you.

LOLLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

[Xiona]

does cuddling on the couch and playing video games count, if that's honestly what you're both into?

I figure we'll do that tonight and if it goes well (this is only the second time we'll be hanging out), I'll pop the dinner question.

personally i would think of something where distractions are possible, not the intent, of the activity. I would think anything in neutral territory, that you are interested in would work as the opener. save the cuddling with video games for later that night if you are feelin each other.

look for local things to participate in, and if all else fails... see if they want to go with you while you do something like shopping for clothes or groceries. the emphasis here is that you are both comfortable and not awkward. jumping right into an intimate setting can be pretty stressful.

[Aristio]

@ the OP

This will answer your question perfectly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DzgecsUGhic

[Ksandra]

I need pics of the guy Yuri!

[Einherjar]

Mike: So how long do I wait to call?
Trent: A day.
Mike: Tomorrow.
Sue: Tomorrow, then a day.
Trent: Yeah.
Mike: So two days?
Trent: Yeah, I guess you could call it that, two days.
Sue: Definitely, two days is like industry standard.
Trent: You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now it's like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is kind of money. What do you think?
Sue: Yeah, but two's enough not to look anxious.
Trent: Yeah, two's enough not to look anxious. But I think three days is kind of money. You know because you...
Mike: Yeah, but you know what, mabey I'll wait 3 weeks. How's that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just happened to run into her number.
Charles: Then ask her where you met her.
Mike: Yeah, I'll ask her where I met her. I don't remember. What does she look like? And then I'll asked if we fucked. Is that... would that be... T, would that be the money?
Trent: You know what. Ha ha ha Mike, laugh all you want but if you call too soon you might scare off a nice baby who's ready to party.
Mike: Well how long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?
Trent, Sue: Six days

[Yuri-G]

I need pics of the guy Yuri!

I have some at home... I'll share them if I get there tonight

[Ksandra]

sweet :D

[Yuri-G]

personally i would think of something where distractions are possible, not the intent, of the activity. I would think anything in neutral territory, that you are interested in would work as the opener. save the cuddling with video games for later that night if you are feelin each other.

look for local things to participate in, and if all else fails... see if they want to go with you while you do something like shopping for clothes or groceries. the emphasis here is that you are both comfortable and not awkward. jumping right into an intimate setting can be pretty stressful.

I like the idea of distractions... hmm I'll have to come up with something. Kinda sucks that it's snowing hardcore right now which limits our options. I think we're not far along enough for a nice dinner, but a movie's too quiet for talking and getting to know each other.

Shopping actually isn't a bad idea, I never would have thought of it as a date night but it works.

[Kerberoz]

If the number of days you wait to contact them actually matters, you two had no chance in the first place.

[Stiker]

My flow chart of "should I call":

Do I want to talk to her?

Yes -> call
No -> don't call

[Tyche]

My flow chart of "should I call":

Do I want to talk to her?

Yes -> call
No -> don't call

This made me laugh more than it should have.

[Jefe]

Call whenever the fuck you want and forget about bullshit "rules." If the person is interested in you he/she/it won't give a fuck either, else you might wanna look elsewhere.

[Talus]

Personal opinion but texting/emails/AIM/etc just shows you're afraid of rejection and want to communicate in a non-personal way. I think you should just talk to him, you'll find out if the relationship has a future a lot faster and save both of you a lot of time dancing around the topic.

I realize it isn't everyone's cup of tea, but I'm a straightforward guy and hate the pre-dating garbage.

I agree texting/e-mail/IMing is a copout. It's impersonal, but then again there are a LOT of people that seem to prefer text communication to actually having a conversation with someone on the phone.

I worry that people will forget how to have conversations, and more and more people will be socially awkward in the future, unable to pick up on simple clues, like when is your turn to speak in small group communication or even just one-on-one.

[Abandon]

Personally if a guy called me the day after a date I wouldn't mind. Don't expect me to be all over you though, just make small talk and show you're easy to talk to.

Maybe I'll suck your dick next time I see you.

mad wisdom