NFL 2010 Offseason Thread

[Tyche]

http://profootballfocus.com has targets listed. Unequivocally the bes site for looking up stats.

[archibaldcrane]

I pulled those off of a blog, so I don't know. Also, regarding the Packers incident..

Apparently some kid (Brandon Underwood) banged 2 bitches at the same time. They said it wasn't consensual. He said it was. How do you rape two women at the same time by yourself?

Ah shit it was Underwood?

Great, last year our secondary gets torched by 3 knee injuries, now we're starting training camp off with 1-on-2 rape.

To answer your question - he's just that good.

[archibaldcrane]

Also, got a link that it was Underwood Tyche? Police still aren't releasing it yet.

[Tyche]

Messageboard fodder.

[archibaldcrane]

Messageboard fodder.

That's all I'm finding too. I think this one will be over very shortly:

Packers investigation moves toward conclusion

Posted by Mike Florio on June 5, 2010 9:52 PM ET
The investigation regarding allegations of sexual assault made by two women against a still-unnamed member of the Green Bay Packers could soon be over, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.

"Our investigation is coming to a conclusion," Lake Delton, Wisconsion Sgt. Gerald Grimsled said, per the Journal Sentinel.

Grimsled acknowledged the discrepancies in the versions of the events. The alleged victims claim lack of consent; the player says there was consent.

"That's the two conflicting reports or stories in the incident that we're getting, yes," Grimsled said.

"We're trying to be careful no matter who it would be," Grimsled said. "We don't want to falsely accuse someone of something when we haven't determined from our side if they did something or didn't do something."

On one hand, we're having a hard time envisioning a situation involving one man and two women and a claim of nonconsensual sexual contact. Without getting overly graphic, it would be difficult to sexually assault one while physically restraining the other from, you know, leaving.

On the other hand, we'll be watching for signs of home cooking in this one. Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger's alleged escapades occurred not in the Pittsburgh area, where his bodyguards are members of law enforcement and the cops have (or at least had) a reputation for looking the other way when a Steelers player gets into trouble. In a small town in a state where the Packers are worshiped, discretion easily can be exercised to conclude that proof beyond a reasonable doubt would never be established at trial, and thus that charges won't be pursued.

The mere fact that the player's name currently is being treated as a state secret makes us wonder whether the authorities are predisposed to accepting his word over the versions supplied by the alleged victims.

[Tyche]

Confirmed that it's Underwood

http://www.jsonline.com/news/wisconsin/95693179.html

messageboards are so god damned surprisingly accurate when it comes to verifying rumors.

[Tyche]

Also, Aaron Rogers is slaying this:

http://i.cdn.turner.com/si/pr/subs/s...nderson_14.jpg

I can assure you, he has no reason at all to sexually assault anyone.

[Mizango]

Isnt Underwood from Cincy? Makes sense. But fuck that noise, I love that dude.

No homo.

[Chun Liroy]

Well, Marshall is pretty much 100 catches and 1000+ yards, so no real expectations other than the norm there.

I'm sure Miz can explain why you're wrong, in godspeak babble.

[Chun Liroy]

LOL this world cup shit... niggas are all stossel over hurr.

[Gadritan]

World cup?

NSFW

Spoiler: show

http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g1...nia-vs-USA.jpg

[Man0warr]

Fair enough they haven't been given the opportunities, but Ogletree with blow up like Austin.

Wasn't Ogletree perfect last year? Or maybe one bad throw by Romo. Pretty sure he caught every pass thrown to him. Best one was that catch on the sideline vs. the Saints.

[Chun Liroy]

Wasn't Ogletree perfect last year? Or maybe one bad throw by Romo. Pretty sure he caught every pass thrown to him. Best one was that catch on the sideline vs. the Saints.

Yes.

[Headspace]

Oh man, he caught all ten throws.

JERRY RICE SHIT

[Fistandantilus]

Obviously Ogletree is learning a lot from the veteran mentor Roy Williams.

[Chun Liroy]

Obviously Ogletree is learning a lot from the veteran mentor Roy Williams.

Isn't your team Seattle? LOL

[Headspace]

Yeah Fist quit talking shit about a team that has Ogletree catching 100% of 5 throws.

[Tyche]

Catching balls is srs bizniss

DAVIE — The footballs came spinning out of a machine in the June midday heat of a steamy South Florida afternoon.
Brandon Marshall stood 10 yards from the contraption with a large wastebasket next to him. The Dolphins' practice session in which Marshall hadn't participated due to recent hip surgery was done. He was alone in an end zone of a practice field - save for a team staffer feeding the footballs into the mechanism.
Marshall would position himself to receive the ball coming from his left side, catch it and dump it into the wastebasket. He'd repeat the process from his right side or straight on. Every once in a while, Marshall would catch a ball one-armed in the crook of his elbow. The wastebasket would fill after a couple of dozen footballs had been dropped into it.
Marshall would frequently call for the machine to be adjusted for angle of delivery. He'd catch throws low and high. But the amazing aspect of the exercise was when Marshall would reach out and make a one-handed catch. Left. Right. Didn't matter.
Pfffft!! The football would hiss through the air.
Zzzzmp!! Marshall would stab it to a halt.
He almost never missed.
OK, OK, he was in shorts and a sweatshirt. There were no defenders. He didn't have to time a cut. But it was an impressive 15 minutes of surreptitious study of the man who comes to the Dolphins as their Great Bright Hope.
"We've put some tests out there for him," Dolphins head coach Tony Sparano had been saying a couple of days earlier. "It's like he's got the secret code underneath his pants. He pulls it out and he's got the list of plays."
The routine is that someone will ask Marshall during practice about a defensive coverage and what route adjustment he should or shouldn't make.
"Let's make sure Brandon is being held accountable for this information just like everybody else," Sparano said. "Brandon knows that."
The word, by the way, is that Marshall is doing nicely in those recognition exams and in classroom study.
Swell, he tests well, which is fine and good and necessary and blah, blah, blah. But it's the catching magic Marshall can deliver that the Dolphins traded (two second-round picks) and are paying (something in the $45-50 million range, according to reports) for.
"Are you appointing me the face of the franchise?" Marshall famously asked during his introductory South Florida news conference upon arrival from the Denver Broncos.
In a word, yes.
Marshall caught 102, 104 and 101 passes in each of the past three seasons. Need some historical perspective? The Dolphins' single-season record is 90 catches by O.J. McDuffie in 1998. Need a more immediate perspective? Davone Bess led the team with 76 receptions last season.
Marshall averaged 1,236 yards receiving during the past three seasons with a high of 1,325 yards. The Dolphins' record isn't much higher (1,389 yards by Mark Clayton in 1984), and Bess led the team last season with 758 yards.
So it is that Marshall carries the weight of great expectations compounded by questions of a bad Broncos attitude and, now, a recent hip surgery. But watching him catch those footballs - especially the one-handed grabs - made for a real-life reminder of something else Marshall said at that "here I am" news conference.
"It's easy for me," he said. "I've been playing football since I was 6 years old. I think I was born with a football in my hand. As long as I continue to do the right things off the field and stay on ... this positive track, the production and the things I'll do on the field is just a habit to me."
Pfffft!! That's the sound of Dolphin dreams hissing through the air.
Zzzzmp!! Will that be the sound of Marshall answering them?

Especially one handed, with a machine, no pads, and no defenders, hell, marshall couldn't even go 100%. Ogletree owns marshall.

[Mizango]

Yeah Fist quit talking shit about a team that has Ogletree catching 100% of 5 throws.

HAHA

[Mizango]

Wasn't Ogletree perfect last year? Or maybe one bad throw by Romo. Pretty sure he caught every pass thrown to him. Best one was that catch on the sideline vs. the Saints.

Yes.

You guys are fucking pathetic lol. He's so good hes exclusively a special teamer that gets on the field as a 7th WR. Good thing Dallas has confidence in him and passed on a WR in the draft.

Also lol @ blowing up like Austin. He got off versus the Chiefs and the fucking Lions, are you bitches shitting me? Every mediocre game he was as invisible as his gum line is large.