What do you guys think about this?

[Ryko]

How does that unbore you? I'm about to repeat the first question.

[Tajin]

And with that bomb-shell good night and good fight.

[Nuketwig]

the saw guy hid the key in your balls and you have to get it out with a screwdriver

This is where I decided not to click.

[MF Perm tha Fineass]

its where I decided you should shut the fuck up

[Colenzo]

How does that unbore you? I'm about to repeat the first question.

I just showed that to everyone on vent without warning of what it was and somebody told me to play some power-ballads and listen to enhance the effect.

I did it to get everyones disgusted reactions. Makes me laugh hard.

[Mertron]

how do you find that pic is my question

what was the google search

"guy gets bizzaro fucked"?

[Conrad]

I hear this is how Arabs do it

[Kyo]

I imagined col's gif guy doing the chicken dance while homo there jabbed his cock, made it funny for me.

[Qalbert]

I hear this is how Arabs do it

when they blow their load, they really blow their load

[Colenzo]

how do you find that pic is my question

what was the google search

"guy gets bizzaro fucked"?

4chan gif section

[Ohaigaiz]

man, FUBAR was a sweet movie:

lol

[ZarakiKujata]

I hear this is how Arabs do it

Those arabs are really fucking smart, btw you can totally use candle wax to do this.

[Qalbert]

^didn't Chuck Palahniuk (sp?) write a short story about that?

[ZarakiKujata]

^didn't Chuck Palahniuk (sp?) write a short story about that?

pretty sure it ended up being totally worth it in the short story. Not like jerking off in the pool.

[Conrad]

Hey someone got the reference

[Qalbert]

pretty sure it ended up being totally worth it in the short story. Not like jerking off in the pool.

found the story, and uh... not worth it

Spoiler: show

Another friend of mine, a kid from school, his older brother in the Navy said how guys in the Middle East jack off different than we do here. This brother was stationed in some camel country where the public market sells what could be fancy letter openers. Each fancy tool is just a thin rod of polished brass or silver, maybe as long as your hand, with a big tip at one end, either a big metal ball or the kind of fancy carved handle you'd see on a sword. This Navy brother says how Arab guys get their dick hard and then insert this metal rod inside the whole length of their boner. They jack off with the rod inside, and it makes getting off so much better. More intense.

It's this big brother who travels around the world, sending back French phrases. Russian phrases. Helpful jack-off tips.

After this, the little brother, one day he doesn't show up at school. That night, he calls to ask if I'll pick up his homework for the next couple weeks. Because he's in the hospital.

He's got to share a room with old people getting their guts worked on. He says how they all have to share the same television. All he's got for privacy is a curtain. His folks don't come and visit. On the phone, he says how right now his folks could just kill his big brother in the Navy.

On the phone, the kid says how -- the day before -- he was just a little stoned. At home in his bedroom, he was flopped on the bed. He was lighting a candle and flipping through some old porno magazines, getting ready to beat off. This is after he's heard from his Navy brother. That helpful hint about how Arabs beat off. The kid looks around for something that might do the job. A ball-point pen's too big. A pencil's too big and rough. But dripped down the side of the candle, there's a thin, smooth ridge of wax that just might work. With just the tip of one finger, this kid snaps the long ridge of wax off the candle. He rolls it smooth between the palms of his hands. Long and smooth and thin.

Stoned and horny, he slips it down inside, deeper and deeper into the piss slit of his boner. With a good hank of the wax still poking out the top, he gets to work.

Even now, he says those Arab guys are pretty damn smart. They've totally re-invented jacking off. Flat on his back in bed, things are getting so good, this kid can't keep track of the wax. He's one good squeeze from shooting his wad when the wax isn't sticking out anymore.

The thin wax rod, it's slipped inside. All the way inside. So deep inside he can't even feel the lump of it inside his piss tube.

From downstairs, his mom shouts it's suppertime. She says to come down, right now. This wax kid and the carrot kid are different people, but we all live pretty much the same life.

It's after dinner when the kid's guts start to hurt. It's wax so he figured it would just melt inside him and he'd pee it out. Now his back hurts. His kidneys. He can't stand straight.

This kid talking on the phone from his hospital bed, in the background you can hear bells ding, people screaming. Game shows.

The X-rays show the truth, something long and thin, bent double inside his bladder. This long, thin V inside him, it's collecting all the minerals in his piss. It's getting bigger and more rough, coated with crystals of calcium, it's bumping around, ripping up the soft lining of his bladder, blocking his piss from getting out. His kidneys are backed up. What little that leaks out his dick is red with blood.

This kid and his folks, his whole family, them looking at the black X-ray with the doctor and the nurses standing there, the big V of wax glowing white for everybody to see, he has to tell the truth. The way Arabs get off. What his big brother wrote him from the Navy.

On the phone, right now, he starts to cry.

They paid for the bladder operation with his college fund. One stupid mistake, and now he'll never be a lawyer.

[Conrad]

lol

[Qalbert]

http://chuckpalahniuk.net/features/shorts/guts

[ZarakiKujata]

found the story, and uh... not worth it

Even now, he says those Arab guys are pretty damn smart. They've totally re-invented jacking off.

In my mind discovering a more pleasurable way to masturbate is > law school lol

[Qalbert]

did you miss the:

This long, thin V inside him, it's collecting all the minerals in his piss. It's getting bigger and more rough, coated with crystals of calcium, it's bumping around, ripping up the soft lining of his bladder, blocking his piss from getting out. His kidneys are backed up. What little that leaks out his dick is red with blood.

?
not worth it, imo