Where's Abandon?

[Trichocyst]

Where in the world is Abandiego?

[Akucaen]

stealing white women and TVs for amurika.

Don't do anything stupid over there Keith.

[Cyn]

More white women for me here on the home turf.

[Abandon]

Better pick up your step. slack too much, and i'm gonna come home and take everything. Me, do something stupid? Never.

[Trichocyst]

You'd better be checking in regularly with ridiculous stories of far off stank you're getting. Remember: European girls are into some kinky shit. I have a friend who was unceremoniously discharged from the Army for killing somebody, so the bar is pretty high for military hijinks.

[Abandon]

I'm no murderer, but I can be a slut if I want. I was talking to my medic today and he told me "Make sure you use rubber, at the least. no point in getting over there and having your dick fall off at the 3rd port"

[Trichocyst]

Fuck that, leave a trail of little Abandons in your wake.

And Tex was acquitted of murder charges.