Online Dating - Anyone tried/willing to share experiences and/or tips?

[Metah]

Its probably not helpful but I met my girlfriend playing Left 4 Dead, lol. She's a damn good player and it was just lucky we lived in the same city. Things have been great since we became friends and then started dating in real life.

[Eaglestrike]

Really don't understand how prudishness becomes maturity. Sure, emotional connections, common interests, blah blah, but at some point you're going to want to get naked.

People on the internet looking for a relationship often are looking for a relationship. There are other sites you can go to if the main activity you're looking for is sex. Prioritizing wanting a relationship first is more likely to find you a relationship than prioritizing sex first.

[Komm Suesser Tod]

Really don't understand how prudishness becomes maturity. Sure, emotional connections, common interests, blah blah, but at some point you're going to want to get naked.

I don't agree with it, I think sex can be a pretty big part of a relationship. I'm pretty sure it stems from eHarmony's religious ties more than anything else.

[Obev]

People on the internet looking for a relationship often are looking for a relationship. There are other sites you can go to if the main activity you're looking for is sex. Prioritizing wanting a relationship first is more likely to find you a relationship than prioritizing sex first.

I don't see how "a relationship" and "sex" are mutually exclusive. The vast majority of people enjoy sex, and to de-prioritize intimacy (especially the most intimate way you can physically be with someone) when looking for a relationship is frankly ridiculous.

[Cesaria]

I've know a few women who've done the match.com routine and had endless creeps and losers out of it - so I'd assume if there was a relatively normal man on there they'd get snapped up no doubt. We always laugh at the "personality questionnaire" ads for e-harmony and are convinced they're along the lines of "do you have a penis"... match up with something that has the corresponding hole - but we're sarcastic sods like that.

Guess it's worth a try - not a route I've ever particularly wanted to go down though (think it's got greater headache potential being female), but I'm yet another who ended up meeting my husband in XI... odds of there being another Brit in a PST timed LS, who happened to be from the same part of the country as I was (well in reverse, he lived where my family did, but had gone to uni where I lived) was probably stupidly small but I'm convinced things only happen when you're not looking for them.

[Pabst]

I met my girlfriend through match.com and it's been over a year now that we been together and I will probably be proposing to her soon, just need the cash for the ring :/
Working 3rd shift made it hard to meet women so I chose online dating.

Actually met some nice girls, and some not so much ( one chick that told me she was divorced but was actually still married and then ended up fucking all my friends ) but mostly I have had some good experiences on match. Just be truthful on the profile and add some humor to it. try to put some of your personality into your profile and you will be surprised with how many bites you can get. There are some fake profiles but you can pick those out easily enough. Eharmony kinda pissed me off with the whole answer all these questions then pay to find out results.. but that was a long time ago when I tried so it might be different now.

[AidenCarby]

It all depends on what your perspective on the word "beautiful" is, at least that's my opinion. I myself have not tried an online dating service but know several people who have and I've heard good things. Just be honest and give it a shot, good luck.

[Vigilia]

Vigilia: +1 to what you said, made me rethink 1 thing or so.... I don't play FFXI anymore though and I doubt there's much UK players anyway XD

I'm not vouching to start FFXI as a dating service (although you would be surprised at how many UK/EU players there are when you start looking), I certainly never intended to find anyone there. It's just total luck anyway where you meet someone, but I guess my point is that you have higher odds of meeting someone that you can get along with if you share interests or common values. I'm a very liberal comics/games nerd girl myself, I never found anyone serious for myself in a pub, night club or on an e-dating service. My husband and the two serious boyfriends I had before him were all met via doing things we both liked (in FFXI, in college doing similar courses and via an animation discussion forum).

Once the initial attraction is over and you settle into a routine you still need something to talk about and enjoy together. Number one reason I give up on a potential new female friend is that I can not be arsed to spend hours choosing a new pair of shoes and then drink latte afterwards discussing the said shoes and should she gotten the blue ones instead. Now I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure any intelligent male looking for a girlfriend is in the same boat, would you want to come home from work to get a 3-hour lecture on the shoes she found today and the latte she had afterwards with her girls? Yeah fuck that. The problem I always had with dating sites is that they do not vet any of that shit out. You can tick a box that asks if you like shopping but what woman wouldn't tick that? I would but there's nowhere under it to specify that I shop online and mostly for DVDs/books and it takes me usually 15mins to find what I want. Another woman would tick that and then go spend all her saturdays in a shopping centre browsing for just the perfect dress. I'll never forget the bad date I had with a guy who had said he's interested in animals and then spent the whole date talking about protecting badgers in Ireland and how if he ever gets his own house he will concrete over most of the back yard and turn it into a huge badger burrow for them to live in. Yikes. If you do go for an e-dating service, you need to read between the lines like never before and good luck!

[arus2001]

Somehow our little town has 4 bars, but I'll be damned if being in any of them feels "right" for me. So, yeah, I can't really bring myself to believe my odds of finding those with similar interests would be high. At most, I might find a younger person who plays video games, but it'd probably be something like Madden or Halo... which I have no interest in, myself. Then again, said person is probably well on their way to being shit-faced, which also isn't my thing.

[Plow]

Everyone on Craigslist is either a guy, fat, a hooker, a fat hooker (most common), or a fat hooker guy.

[Eaglestrike]

I don't see how "a relationship" and "sex" are mutually exclusive. The vast majority of people enjoy sex, and to de-prioritize intimacy (especially the most intimate way you can physically be with someone) when looking for a relationship is frankly ridiculous.

Oh, I agree. However, it is generally perceived that someone looking for sex is only interested in sex. Which therefore leads people to believe someone looking specifically for a relationship is far more serious about actually finding a match. It isn't mutually exclusive, but in how many people perceive the situation it is.

[The Stig]

Komm Suesser Tod: Sex. Hmm.... well, it would be nice of course but ... I'm not too fussed, I'm sure it'll come eventually, unless something goes horribly wrong. However I think/feel at the moment something quite long term would be better, I kinda want someone else other than close friends (mainly male) and family caring for me haha, thought it'd be nice... but to clear it up for people, relationship is more of a thing I'm looking for.

wop: ah yes i remember that site now, I wondered why it sounded so familiar.

I think I can easily add personality to my profile/chat sessions, at work we have a small team outsourced in India and it seems I'm 99% the most popular guy amongst the team of mixed genders, typically because I take the time to chat to them properly as if they're humans and they actually speak to me properly (i.e. casually) unlike the other guys in the office where they literally slave treat them. So I think I got this area well covered, and I'm relaxed/opened minded about almost anything, I just don't really drink or go to clubs (I hate noisy places), but I don't mind spending my time doing anything else, so I think I got this well covered should it advance to such a stage.

vigilia: yeh I was just saying in the context of FFXI, however you are still correct. The badger obsession thing sure is a red alert though, I would pick it up instantly.

Just something I want to mention, do these sites (i've not looked yet) have some sort of "preference" profile as to what type of race you are looking for; so I can filter? I don't specifically find Black girls attractive (absolutely no offense, it's the skin tone. Have to be rather light brown or "tanned" if the girl is Black), and I do not want Chinese either. I won't mind anything else though, for now.

[miokomioko]

I've met my share of people online... More often than not, they will probably be decent people, obviously having met requirements of similar interests/lifestyle/etc. in order for you to even bother taking the step to meeting them in person. Spend an evening talking to them and you will soon see what makes them odd enough to try resort to online dating. This is assuming you don't happen to be the same type of odd. If you are, you found a match and you're lucky as shit.

[Vigilia]

Just something I want to mention, do these sites (i've not looked yet) have some sort of "preference" profile as to what type of race you are looking for; so I can filter? I don't specifically find Black girls attractive (absolutely no offense, it's the skin tone. Have to be rather light brown or "tanned" if the girl is Black), and I do not want Chinese either. I won't mind anything else though, for now.

Pretty sure they all have tick boxes for ethnic origin.

[wop]

RACIST

[ZarakiKujata]

Is there a limit on how many times you can apply to beautiful people?

[Not Kuno]

Not a fan of dating sites. The problem with trying to meet women online is that they are always fat/ugly/dumb/guys or some combination of most of those.

[The Stig]

Nooo, not racist, just preference lol.

Not Kuno: you're right, this is also my assumption, but I got told this was an old fashioned thought and now it's relatively common and there's less of that. However I'm still scared of this.

[Not Kuno]

I tried it for half a year and below was all who messaged me:

Fat chicks
Non-whites (not racist, just picky)
Chicks that just wanted sex

[Komm Suesser Tod]

Honestly, you should maybe think about trying one of the specialized nerd dating services like soul geek. Never used them, so I couldn't vouch for them, but it might make it easier to get someone who shares your interests.