Am I a douche?

[Velgadess]

it just sucks. everyone covered everything dealt with similar shit. girl I met was first for pretty much everything sex, gf, serious relationship, cheated on, etc etc. took a few years to get over it.

we are still friends this girl and I. I went thru the whole cutting off all communication but then stuff happened. during the whole getting over part she got pregnant and had a kid with another guy. the guy was good @ heart but just didn't have maturity to be a father. couldn't hold a job for more than a couple weeks, never finished basic training and failed @ military. instead of being an adult mentally and finacially responsible, getting weed and high was more important. girl hated that. wanted me to be the "father" I was like pssh whatever...." about 1 month after kid was born it died. I easily could've been said "ha you deserved it" and cut off all ties, didn't.

this all happened in my early 20's. fast forward to early 30's. after many relationships, she talks about regretting her choices back in the day and wants to get together again, I'm not so sure. lots of trust issues needing to be adressed.

all I can say it'll get better with time. not everyone is like this but as you get older random hook ups, flings, etc etc get less appealing and wanting to have a more mature stable relationship is more important.

[Drako]

i understand you, i usually build open relationships also but with the same conditition that she will be honest about and tell me if something happened and of course, if i somehow asked about it. Omission is not a lie either dishonesty.
I have an open relationship right now that i had a little fight other day because of possible lies, but i cant be sure. I was trying for a couple weeks already to go out with her or get her to come to my house but she always had some kind of excuse (we usually meet 2-4 times a month). One day when i asked her to come to my house, she said that wouldnt be possible because she was going to dance with a partner so she could train for her mothers birthday or something, of course she would just fuck the guy if he tried, but by the time i knew she would tell if this happened since she told me other stuff, we talk about other partners sometimes, and she did. Couple days later i got a sms from her asking me if she could come to my house, 10 min later i saw the msg and replied yes. She didnt respond back after 1 hour, it was getting late already and i sent another msg asking if she would come, no answer, i even sent another one before going to sleep.

So, what i though was the sent msgs for me and other person or multiple persons, since i already done that and i know ppl with multiple partners do this sometimes. But at same time i was so angry because we knew each other for a couple years already and this was a nice open relationship with no needs for lies. I avoid calling her and figuring out she was with someone else. Next day i got a msg in the morning saying that she slept and didnt saw the msg, but, wtf? how can someone sleep 10 minutes after sending a msg to someone and worst, she cleared want to come to my house, why she was laying down at all? The other day she asked me to go to lunch with her, after that we fucked in public in my car lol, that was even worse i guess because it was probably a way to say she was sorry, but sorry about what? if she really slept there was nothing she could do.
To this day i still think she was with someone else that day, but since i cant prove and she swears she didnt, how can i say anything?
Women are like this, there is just too much easy dick around.

I think you managed this situation very badly though, in your shoes i would had gotten the ps3 by force and never seeing or contacting her again. If she did contact me, i would go out with her, try to be nice enough to fuck her later and never contact her again.. and would do the same thing over and over..
but i guarantee she will not contact you to fuck again, just to get stuff, since most women care more about money and stuff than sex.

[Sylphet]

I'm not reading through 8 pages of responses so sorry if I'm repeating what other people have said.

This may end up being a mini rant because reading things like this frustrates me. You said yourself you loved this girl. Love and open relationships really don't go well together. Maybe I'm reading into this too much but it seems to me that you loved this girl so much you were afraid to do anything other than what you felt she wanted. You wanted a relationship with her so you got her everything she could want, let her do whatever she wanted and what exactly did you get in return? She didn't even have the balls to be honest with you. Part of it is her fault for using you but part of it is your fault for letting yourself get used.

Relationships (of any kind) only work when both people want the same thing and respect the same set of rules.

Bottom line: Fuck buddies/friends with benefits really only work when you don't love the other person. Sorry but that's the truth.

I know it hurts terribly but you'll get over it. There's a middle ground between being a jerk and being a pushover - try to find it, then try to find a girl who really loves and appreciates you.

[Abandon]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL.

Now that I got that out, I can't believe the amount of people here not realizing that seno is indeed a douche , but not for this girl situation, but for trolling the brakes out of you people.

[wipers]

Not sure if it has been posted but John Edward is still the biggest douche in the universe. So, no you are not a douche. On topic my friend is still dealing with an ex-girlfriend after a year. If you really loved this woman it might take a while.

[Wulfgang]

I thought Senoska was a chick, ergo either:

A) I'm wrong
B) She's a lesbian
C) All got trolled as Abandon said

[Qalbert]

[Senoska]

I thought Senoska was a chick, ergo either:

A) I'm wrong
B) She's a lesbian
C) All got trolled as Abandon said

Ahahahahaha

[Abandon]

Seno, this was truly a funny read.

[ozz]

Utterly pathetic, yet extremly entertaining at the same time. If I was ever in a endgame LS and found out they did stuff so manipulative i'd just quit and become a crafting whore again.

[Ansems]

Douche isnt close to what you are.
Yer a waste of sperm.

[Abandon]

oh u

[LinktheDeme]

my thread is better

[Arvin]

i still want to go out if im back home, seno. unfortunately my scheduling is shit and im busy every day for a few weeks

[Senoska]

I'm down for hanging any time, Avrin. Feel free to hit me up on AIM or shoot me a message any time you can make it back home. :]

[Brill Weave]

Sorry Seno. Read it and it sounds like you bit off more than you could chew and treated it like a relationship whereas she didn't. Sucks man and it's a tough lesson to learn. Remember that next time. I now leave you with the best knowledge a man can ever have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4R5NQPdi42w&feature=fvst

Learn it. Live it.