NFL Week 1: PUT IT ON THE BOARD!

[Moss]

One of my fondest memories as a Panthers fan.

lol I can imagine

[Gadritan]

Well, ever since 02' I've hated him with a fucking passion. Ya'll beat us a combined 71-0 that year.

[Zoolander]

Idk if you can call Boldin a #2. Housh, yea for sure...but Boldin is a fucking beast. Still remember playing fantasy football 2003 and his first career game he comes outta fucking nowhere for 200 yds and 2 TDs, grabbed him off the waiver wire and won me a championship.

[Gadritan]

<---preemptive strike on the DWill highlights what will follow Sunday's game.

I think Boldin would have been a #1 on pretty much any other team. Kinda' hard to supplant Fitz, lol.

[Tyche]

The Miami Dolphins have signed....

ready for it...

Bobby "The Seagull" Carpenter.

[Penthesilea]

idn't he get traded to the Rams in that Alex Barron deal?

[Bregor]

Idk if you can call Boldin a #2. Housh, yea for sure...but Boldin is a fucking beast. Still remember playing fantasy football 2003 and his first career game he comes outta fucking nowhere for 200 yds and 2 TDs, grabbed him off the waiver wire and won me a championship.

I remember that game, went to sign him three minutes too late. Greatest garbage-time receiver ever.

[Gadritan]

The Miami Dolphins have signed....

ready for it...

Bobby "The Seagull" Carpenter.

LOL! Wtf man. Get down there and set the Tuna straight.

[Mizango]

One of my fondest memories as a Panthers fan.

Amen, I fucking hated Vick the entire Falcons organization back then, they were raping us hard.

The Miami Dolphins have signed....

ready for it...

Bobby "The Seagull" Carpenter.

I saw that this morning and had a fantastic laugh.

[Resin]

Late to the party, but I don't know what I'm more upset about: Revis finally agreeing to a deal or picking up The Seagull™...

[Conrad]

Hey Skirks, your name came up again today, this is how serious our practical joke on you is going to be

Spoiler: show

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y15...dExGlobal2.jpg

Niggas gotta go to an extradition free country and shit, Jewish retribution aint nothing to fuck with.

I don't even

[Mizango]

HAHA.

[Conrad]

I like the picture name.

[Mizango]

Damn skippy.

[archibaldcrane]

Skirk, are you going to play with Penthesilea and I when I'm in Philly next weekend?

[Gadritan]

So uh, is it Thursday yet?

[Mizango]

So uh, is it Thursday yet?

I feel like that guy from the MNF commercials, I cant wait for Thursday.

[Gadritan]

rofl. Skins and Titans talking about a Haynesworth trade.

[Penthesilea]

Here are some of the best previews for the season:

NFC East
New York Giants

* Strength: Excellent at believing Eli Manning is a Hall of Fame quarterback; cohesive offensive line understands that blocking begins when ball is snapped
* Weakness: No one but players able to afford entry into new $1.6 billion stadium
* Player To Watch: After missing most of the 2009 season with a knee injury, Kenny Phillips has looked pretty good in practice, although nobody remembers who he is or what position he plays
* Biggest Question: How will the Giants handle a very tough schedule that includes games against the Indianapolis Colts, their division rivals, the 1996 All-Madden team, and the '78 Steelers?

Dallas Cowboys

* Strength: Yes, there are positives, but reading them will only make you angry and listing them will only make us angry
* Weakness: Other than being the most infuriating, knuckle-whitening, I-want-to-throw-a-brick-through-my-television-set-when-I-watch-them team in the league, are a little weak at free safety
* Intangibles: Fuck the Dallas Cowboys and every fucking thing they stand for; special teams
* Biggest Question: Can they finally get over the hump and get back to the Super Bowl, and do they know how much that would depress the entire U.S. populace?

Philadelphia Eagles

* Strength: Though they have lost Donovan McNabb's rocket arm, they have gained a highly accurate short-range subsonic cruise missile of an arm in Kevin Kolb
* Weakness: With the loss of Brian Westbrook, the Eagles have a major hole at starting knee injury and concussion
* Player To Watch: Michael Vick's athleticism as he walks up and down the sideline, sits down on a bench, and jumps up whenever he thinks his name is called but realizes the coaches are talking to another Michael, is something to marvel at
* Biggest Question: When will Philadelphia fans finally use their car-battery catapult?

Washington Redskins

* Strength: Acquisition of 33-year-old Donovan McNabb gives them a solid quarterback for maybe four weeks
* Weakness: Receivers, running backs, offensive line, and defense, but, um, this is the year the Redskins really turn it around
* Player To Watch: Albert Haynesworth, in that uncomfortable car-accident can't-stop-looking way
* Biggest Question: By how big a margin will the Redskins beat the Rams, and how many games will that buy Donovan McNabb before fans want him benched?

http://www.theonion.com/articles/oni...18023/?slide=7

The Onion has to be the absolute number 1 source for news and entertainment.

[Chun Liroy]

Oh god that's going in m sig lmao.