Moving Out

[Norellicus]

Why? It's no different than taking a room for rent. You said yourself, why not just live in a room instead of the basement (which I personally fail to understand the distinction you're making)?

[Kuya]

Perhaps it's the association to vampires, fat nerds, and creepers that makes me question to idea of choosing to live in a basement over a normal room.

edit: i don't see how a basement is more comfortable than a room outside of size.

[Lane]

Basements don't exist where I live (they can't be built)
You know, I've lived in like 10 different houses in my life. I move a lot.

[Norellicus]

It has three out-facing windows that bear sunlight (built on a slope), is completely constructed out as a living space; the only difference is that it is not on or above the ground floor. I recognize the fact that there is a stigma associated with the "parents' basement" but that's what I'm challenging, so what exactly is your reasoning for it being a less acceptable solution besides the associative social stigma?

[Kuya]

Your defensiveness is annoying me. If you don't like people thinking less of you for living in a basement, then go start a political party, scrub. If your basement looks fantastic, fine for you, but don't be surprised (of course you aren't) if people think of you as a mouthbreather.

I would suggest cutting the defensiveness though, since it's never a good thing to come off as the equivalent of a self-rightious pride queen.

[Norellicus]

I'm not defensive, I'm trying to engage the conversation. You're making points and I'm pointing out the faulty logic. You're the one who's always asking questions from both sides of the fence in these topics.

[Cyn]

I'm not defensive, I'm trying to engage the conversation. You're making points and I'm pointing out the faulty logic. You're the one who's always asking questions from both sides of the fence in these topics.

.....

[kuronosan]

What interesting discussions we have here... well, just waiting tomorrow to hear from a couple of places then I'll probably tell him before I head to work. Just about ready to get it off my chest thanks to the choice words here.

Guess my worst fear is really just the earthquake and not so much the aftershocks. Dunno what I'm worried about, I think it's just instinct because as a 29-year old I really don't give a shit about whether my parents want me to stay or leave or not. Ultimately it's my choice, yea?

What I take away from this is to just not entertain the horse shit arguments that will be made and just reinforce with "Moving out for me. Grown up. Etc etc."

[Tagus]

When I moved out of my parents house, the first place I lived was in a friend's basement for $200 a month. I didn't even have a door to the bedroom, just a section of carpeting nailed over the door opening. It worked fine, until one of my roommates fell into it and tore it down in a drunken stupor at a halloween party, after falling face first into our apple bobbing kiddie pool and wrecking the whole damn basement I lived in. I eventually had to move back home, because the owner sold the house out from under us, and I couldn't do anything about it because I never signed a lease.

I still look back on that experience and laugh my ass off. Don't be afraid to live your life. You might get a few "I told you so's" if you ever have move back, but have some f'ing fun.

[Cyn]

What interesting discussions we have here... well, just waiting tomorrow to hear from a couple of places then I'll probably tell him before I head to work. Just about ready to get it off my chest thanks to the choice words here.

Guess my worst fear is really just the earthquake and not so much the aftershocks. Dunno what I'm worried about, I think it's just instinct because as a 29-year old I really don't give a shit about whether my parents want me to stay or leave or not. Ultimately it's my choice, yea?

What I take away from this is to just not entertain the horse shit arguments that will be made and just reinforce with "Moving out for me. Grown up. Etc etc."

I think you should go see a fucking doctor about it.

[kuronosan]

I think you should go see a fucking doctor about it.

Touché.

[quannum]

learn how to address the emotion, failing that..

"hey pops i'm moving out"
"but ..."
"i understand your concerns, but i need to move out"
"what about ..."

rinse, repeat

[Awoir]

Invite your girlfriend over for dinner with your parents and have sex with her on the table while they eat. That should solve all your problems.

[kuronosan]

Anyway, I told them. No explosions or world-ending apocalypses to be had. Although towards the end my father was like "I wish you the best and I hope it works out for you but I'll just be honest and say blah blah blah your girlfriend should be someone who cares about your family".

Well, I dismissed most of it but yea... weight off of my shoulders and what not. I appreciate the advices, those who sounded like Isladar's were the most helpful.

[Ddboner]

Heres a "cool story bro"

Guess I'm late the the party but "Basement apartments" in the parents house ain't so bad.

I moved out of my folks place about 4 years ago with my now fiance. I paid about 1200 bucks a month for a craptacular 2 bedroom apt in a concrete box. Shared the laundry room (6/8 machines broken 99% of the time) with a bunch of white trash idiots. Had to fight a drunken retard off his girlfriend and baby in the hallway outside my unit. Dealt with stupid apt inspections every 6 months. Threats to evict after fairly docile parties that ended at 11pm. My car being egged etc in the parking lot. You name it been through it all at this place. Not all apts are like this but we had our reasons for choosing it. Was not in a nasty neighborhood or anything.

Fast forward 3 years, I moved back into my parents place with her. We pay 250 / month rent. My apt in the basement (oooo) has is own entrance. The house is located on the water, in a forested area. We have a nice 2 car garage for our cars now. My own laundry room and kitchen. We saved almost all the cash for our wedding, and bought a car and saving the down payment for house. None of this would have happened had they not offered this too us. Basement apts ain't always bad.

The reason I moved out was mostly because the stigma was getting to me of being living under the parents roof even though I had graduated college. In hindsight, man I was dumb to move out. I basically paid 1000+ extra / month rent just for the satisfaction of being able to say I moved out. 30,000 dollars paid in rent later I don't think it was worth it. Although I get along with my folks fairly well, and I don't have the issue of them hating my spouse. If I could do it again, I'd have mooched that shit long as possible, saved like a mofo, and bought a house and been done with it. Renting sucks balls....

Just presenting another opinion