Unleash the Trolls

[Gorki]

So I need some BG troll help, to make a very long story short I've been with my girlfriend for 2 years now. One of her crazy ex boyfriends (jail, flunked out high school, and acts like he's the toughest 5'3 ginger in the world) out of the blue a few weeks ago started having all his missed calls forwarded to her phone and won't stop blowing up her phone. I finally got it fixed so it won't forward the calls but now he's sending me all this shit on my facebook and he's pissing me off.

Now to the solution, he lives pretty far away so the obvious "go beat his ass" isn't very practical yet. My girlfriend has a restraining order but the police wouldn't do anything so what I want to do is find something that would constantly make his phone go off. Now I remember a few years ago hearing about a website you could put someone's cell number in and it would text/call them every few hours offering random goods and services from businesses.

Or if anyone has any good ways to just annoy the fuck out of this guy like he did me for a few weeks.

edit for pic, sorry about the size. small picture is small

[kuronosan]

How about you just ignore it, block him on facebook, and change her number?

Are people seriously this fucking retarded these days?

[Faris]

lol, thats a very good answer kuro.

but i think the OP is out to do some damage first.


send him a dead cat through FedEx, with a note saying if you dont stop, you're next carrot dick

or better, send him a chopped carrot, and say "if you dont stop your dick is next carrot dick"

im too good

[Gorki]

How about you just ignore it, block him on facebook, and change her number?

Are people seriously this fucking retarded these days?

OMG I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT EVER, you must be a doctor or something.

[Gorki]

l

but i think the OP is out to do some damage first.

This.

This guy gave my girlfriend and myself shit for the first year we dated and I ignored it because he is just a piece of shit. But honestly I want to just pound his fucking head flat but would rather get back at him in a way that won't make me the asshole in jail with no girlfriend.

[kuronosan]

OMG I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT EVER, you must be a doctor or something.

Well maybe you should have went with it instead of asking a forum how you can troll someone you're clearly not afraid of.

Maybe you're just an insecure shithead, how should I know?

[Omnipotent]

http://crabrevenge.com/

[Souj]

Step 1.Train a pony to bite his dick off. Then leak that info so he will send his parents to the farm where the pony you are training lives.
Step 2. When his parents get there they will be shot on sight by the drunken redneck who's land they are trespassing on.
Step 3. Take the bodies of his dead parents and grind them into some chili.
Step 4. Eat all the chili, go into his house when he's asleep, rape him, and cut off his legs and arms at the knees/elbows, leaving him with only stumps.

You have now had your revenge.

[Gorki]

Maybe, maybe not. I'm insecure about one thing, my hairy ass legs, but my women loves them so honestly I don't care. It's not like he's the one who calling/texting, it was the army recruiter who he pissed off, the black guy who wants him dead and the people he owes money. So am I insecure about losing my girl to him?(if thats what your implying) I'm not. and Exactly, you don't know.

Plus I like how your argument for BG Health, Law, general helps threads, is always along the lines of "why are you asking this on an internet forum". Get over it, I'm not close friends with anyone who is very internet/tech savvy so please please please excuse me for asking a question on the interweb kuro.

[Faris]

before you do anything, you gotta watch law abiding citizen.

this movie says one thing, and one thing only, revenge.

[Gorki]

Step 4. Eat all the chili

May I substitute for goulash?

[Faris]

Maybe, maybe not. I'm insecure about one thing, my hairy ass legs

i hope you dont tell that your woman...noone wants to hear a guy talk about his insecurity. shit

Plus I like how your argument for BG Health, Law, general helps threads, is always along the lines of "why are you asking this on an internet forum". Get over it, I'm not close friends with anyone who is very internet/tech savvy so please please please excuse me for asking a question on the interweb kuro.

not religion threads? i am disappoint.

[Gorki]

you gotta watch law abiding citizen.

I don't remember it that well, but then again it was Gerard Butler.

[Gorki]

I am genuinely hinking of the cat thing Firas, I have a stray hanging out trying to bang my kitten. So theres the ammo

[arus2001]

I imagine sending some kind of dead animal would qualify for a bio-hazard violation, so.. uh, don't do that.

[Uzor]

Send him a pair of your girlfriend's (or another female) used underwear filled with red package crabs from the link Omnipotent sent you.

Additionally, you could give his number out to a bunch of hookers and drug dealers/junkies. The police is on lookout for calls made to/from those numbers (I know that from experience, but that's another story), so that could make the police suspicious of him - especially if he's already been in jail.

[Zilong]

Is dead cat an euphemism for anthrax and/or c4?

[Eggroll]

How about you just ignore it, block him on facebook, and change her number?

Are people seriously this fucking retarded these days?

I'm with kuro on this one. If the guy is crazy enough to have harassed you for a few years already, it seems counterintuitive to give him more of a reason to do so. Rolling in the mud will only come back to bite you in the ass.

[Melchiah]

Obtain a box from your local post office large enough to contain a DVD and a pair of panties. You know, one of those "if it fits, it ships" boxes.

Next, film yourself and your ladyfriend having awesome sex and be sure to film yourself blowing a load on her sexiest thong panties. Bonus points if you do things to her she wouldn't do with him.

Next, burn these illicit acts caught on video to the DVD mentioned earlier, and label the disc something like "I can keep this up as long as you can."

Send him the box with the disc and soiled panties to complete your revenge/humiliation of a rival.

DISCLAIMER: Try not to identify yourself or your girl in the video. It's no use getting revenge if he can bring charges.

[archibaldcrane]

Obtain a box from your local post office large enough to contain a DVD and a pair of panties. You know, one of those "if it fits, it ships" boxes.

Next, film yourself and your ladyfriend having awesome sex and be sure to film yourself blowing a load on her sexiest thong panties. Bonus points if you do things to her she wouldn't do with him.

Next, burn these illicit acts caught on video to the DVD mentioned earlier, and label the disc something like "I can keep this up as long as you can."

Send him the box with the disc and soiled panties to complete your revenge/humiliation of a rival.

DISCLAIMER: Try not to identify yourself or your girl in the video. It's no use getting revenge if he can bring charges.

I like where your head's at.