Girlfriend problems...

[Syntex]

So I get a call about 20 minutes ago with my girlfriend and she is hysterical crying and upset. I find out this guy she told me about last week she hangs out with on campus occasionally told her he does have feelings for her but respects our relationship which is now going on 6 months. He hasn't made any moves or anything but she has started to develop feelings for him and doesn't know what to do hence why she called me in tears. She has been in several relationships one of which was 3 years and never felt this way before.

I honestly don't know wtf I should do. I'm half tempted to go up to the school and dislocate his jaw with my fist but part of me says that will only make it worse. I love her and don't want her to leave but I don't know what to do. I was hoping someof you guys on here would have some experience in this field and could give me some advice.

[Valisk]

Dammit Denchi! Oh wait...

[Pikarya]

Age? Also mandatory BG tits seal.

[Zoolander]

Telling her "you love her and dont want her to leave" might be a nice start.

Dealing with conflicting emotions is a part of life.

edit: my only beef is that she came right out and told you this. what exactly does she expect you to do? is she the kind of chick that would just be trolling a little bit for more attention? idk...too many other factors.

[Cephius]

She's straying, dump her and move on, save yourself 6 months of yelling, pain, and heartbreak

[lathia]

You do nothing, tell her to get her shit together.

Well.. i guess by telling her, you're actually doing something. Do that then!

[isladar]

This sounds like her problem. Don't entertain it. Either she's committed to be with you or she isn't; there isn't room in a relationship for "but I kinda feel something for this other person". Tell her what you want (which is, I'm assuming, to be in a relationship with her), and tell her what you feel for her. Tell her to figure out what she wants to do, because no one else can do it for her. This is really an open and shut situation, because dragging out "I don't know what to doooo!" is insulting to all parties involved.

The conversation doesn't have to be presented as an ultimatum, but it's going to be one in essence. If you've represented yourself, and the relationship well, there isn't anything else you should have to do. If she wants to chase after ever ovary flutter, then she probably isn't ready to be in a grown-up relationship.

[Headspace]

Cut the bitch loose

K-ROLD

[Kurokikaze]

She's straying, dump her and move on, save yourself 6 months of yelling, pain, and heartbreak

^ this.

/thread

[Valisk]

In all honesty dude, you have to let her go. If she has admittedly developed feelings for someone else, things will slowly but surely drift apart. When you two get into arguments, guess who she's going to run to. When you are busy or aren't answering your phone, guess who she's going to rely on.

She put herself in a bad position by hanging out with someone so much that she developed feelings for that person. That's a big no-no. What was she doing hanging around this dude so often anyway? If they hang out again in the future, there WILL be flirting, he WILL make sarcastic comments towards you and your relationship, and despite saying he respects your relationship, he didn't respect it enough to keep his mouth closed about how he "feels" about her.

That's a tactic to draw women closer to you. Telling them how you feel but throwing in "but I respect you relationship." It lets the woman know he's interested but at the same time coming off as a "great guy/friend" by being respectful. Although it may hurt or you love her, you have to let her go. Cliche: "If you love someone, set them free. If they come back to you, give them a STD test. If it's negative, they're yours forever. If it's positive, then it was never meant to be."

[Alarial]

Commit to having an open relationship since that's what she apparently wants. Enjoy having her as a friend/sex buddy and skip the jealous/MINE part of the equation. Let her enjoy and live life, while still hanging out and pleasuring you. You both win.

Or pretend people are suggestions and give her an ultimatum that will end up as everyone has forecasted (her leaving you for him).

[foopy]

She's straying, dump her and move on, save yourself 6 months of yelling, pain, and heartbreak

yep.

this is by far the best advice. seriously.

[Jefe]

She's dumb, well at that age both parties are dumb. Most really don't know what the fuck they want/haven't experienced shit, and thus must get it out of their systems. That's why shit like this happens all the time. If you 'love' her, talk to her to get her shit together. Tell her something like 'we've been together for...' wait, six months? Yeah, put this behind you and move the fuck on. Hate to sound like this, but she sounds like a piece of work.

[Amelya]

If you've only been together 6 months and she's already interested in someone else I'd cut your losses and move on.

[Hex]

Could just beat the shit out of the guy and tell him to respectfully stay the fuck away. But figuring you've only got 6 months invested in this, walk away. 6 months is nothing when it comes to time spent on someone. Who knows maybe she'll learn her lesson and you guys can give it another go with her having a stronger appreciation for you.

Things have to run their course in life, we're humans, our feelings run out of whack all the time and sometimes you have to try new things to know what you're missing. Best thing for you to do is just tell her if she's got these feelings maybe it's best she figures out who she is and whatever she chooses you wish her the best. Then you pull the "but I'll always be here" card. That way if you're really open to one day giving her another chance, the door is open and she knows it.

And in the mean time, have some fun.

[Blackice]

It's been stated a few times already but, if the thought of someone else is already in her head then you may as well do yourself a favor and move on. Otherwise, you'll only be sticking it out for more pain and drama down the road.

[Effluo]

Let her go... This is the first symptom in a long line of serious mental disorders to come. Cut her lose and save yourself the headache and heartache later

[Zoolander]

wtf are you guys talking about? having conflicting emotions is something everyone deals with, there is not one fucking person that is so perfect for you, especially at that age & after only 6 months, that makes everyone else seem dumb, uninteresting, and ugly. the only difference here is that shes actually being open & honest with him about it, which isn't exactly a horrendous trait to have in a partner. its not like she went after this guy, he went after her.

im not saying things are going to work out for the OP, but your reactions are terrifying. no wonder guys get such a shitty rap. keep lowering the bar, doing a great job.

[miokomioko]

Everything Isladar said.

[takethistoyourgrave]

Walk away. She is young, I'm assuming you are young, and this will surely cause heartbreak down the road.