Open relationships - Your opinion.

[Odon]

Trying to figure out some stuff and I'd like to see what other people's opinions are on the matter of an open relationship.

What do you define as one?
What would you consider as rules to having one?
Do you think it's just a bullshit way to get ass?
Anything else you can think of.

[Tonko]

Trying to figure out some stuff and I'd like to see what other people's opinions are on the matter of an open relationship.

Can of worms, open, incomming.

What do you define as one?

Sexual relations with other people with the consent of your current partner. It's not cheating if the other half knows, and approves.

What would you consider as rules to having one?

100% communication about activities, and 100% approval required from the other half for activity with said 3rd person. Using protection to avoid being that other momma's baby's daddy, and limiting STD transmission.

Do you think it's just a bullshit way to get ass?

I've been in an open relationship for 7 years come February, men are going to have the biological urge to fuck around. Societal programming can cause some men to overcome this urge, but it's always there on an instinctual level. Some women just really like sex. They sometimes tie it into their sense of self-worth and esteem, it's more complicated as to why they like multiple partners than it is for a man to just want one.

Anything else you can think of.

If you don't trust her, or she doesn't trust you, or if there is an ounce of jealousy in either of your personalities, it will be doomed to failure. One of the great failings of ANY relationship is the concept that you have some sort of ownership/control over your partner. You don't. You never will. They are their own person with their own agendas, likes, and dislikes.
Finding the right pairing of people to make an open relationship truly work, is quite rare. The realization that sex is simply an extracurricular physical activity that is physically pleasing needs to be present on both sides. Love is not attached, or related to the activity of sex with anyone outside of your partner. You fuck some ass/hole/pussy/knotholeinatree and it's just you getting off and enjoying yourself. Emotional fidelity is paramount, if there is temptation to leave your partner for someone else, then you shouldn't be with who you're with.

[skurlover]

Trying to figure out some stuff and I'd like to see what other people's opinions are on the matter of an open relationship.

What do you define as one? Open relationship is having multiple partners (sexually) outside of your "actual" mate imo.

What would you consider as rules to having one? Not necessarily rules, but you better damn well be sure both people are completely ok with the current relationship being total shit in a short time. I can understand having threesomes and orgies if that is what you want, but generally having private sex outside of the relationship will lead to jealously at some point.

Do you think it's just a bullshit way to get ass? Yes, I have never even thought of having an open relationship with someone that I actually cared about, I don't care what people say there is always emotion attached with sex.

[GraveRobberX]

OOooooooooh!!!! Tonko advice

getting the Popcorn, reserved this seat ^-^

[Andarvi]

Doesnt work. I cant imagine being ok with someone having sex with my girlfriend. It literally makes me want to throw up.

[Maxxthepenguin]

Reserved for a more extensive post once I get home from class.

OH GOD NO

[Tyche]

Open relationships as in having relationships outside of your primary relationship? I would have no part of that. Not with a child. Maybe it's fine for young singles who have no intention of getting married. I can't see how you could hold a serious relationship and go out and get another piece of ass from another person. Sounds like a "PC" term for cheating. Then again, I do know a couple who swings and they've been together for a while. I guess it could be great for couples in rare instances, but I'd imagine that the percentages favor the "doomed for failure" outcome.

[Izzy]

Open relationships are a fucking bullshit way of being able to fuck lots of people.

Personally, I think it's disgusting.

[Hitoshura]

Fuck that shit.

[Maxxthepenguin]

Fuck that shit.

That is the purpose of such a relationship

My opinion is that if you want an open relationship, just break up

[Daahan]

No thanks.

If you really want to call someone your boyfriend/girlfriend then that is the only person you should be with; no excuses. If you go screw around with other people, then that person isn't your boyfriend/girlfriend, he/she is just your fuckbuddy.

[Hitoshura]

Seriously, don't even throw in the word relationship.

[Mizango]

Open relationships as in having relationships outside of your primary relationship? I would have no part of that. Not with a child. Maybe it's fine for young singles who have no intention of getting married. I can't see how you could hold a serious relationship and go out and get another piece of ass from another person. Sounds like a "PC" term for cheating. Then again, I do know a couple who swings and they've been together for a while. I guess it could be great for couples in rare instances, but I'd imagine that the percentages favor the "doomed for failure" outcome.

To echo on what Ty just said, it would indeed depend on the type of relationship you and your gf, wife has. Are you all naturally trusting or is jealousy rampant throughout your relationship? It would have to vary from couple to couple, you just have to find what works for you. When you are with someone for 10, 15, 20 years, I suppose smacking the same piece of cooter ever other night would get monotonous. As long and you and her are 100% secure in yourselves and your relationship and you BOTH are in it and have realistic expectations and limitations, then I don't see why I wouldn't work.

An open relationship can also consist of inviting someone else into your relationship. Yes that includes your gf being Bi and having a hot friend that you and her wouldnt mind hooking up with, or same in a MF relationship where the guy was Bi and invited another male into the bedroom. There are downsides to all scenarios, Most people today have a "Dont ask, dont tell" policy in relationships, ignorance truly is bliss. Being open and up front is is much better than lying and sneaking around pounding Jenn and her friend after a drunken night out, why not find out if your GF likes Jenn also and just kill 2 birds with one stone. That was pure hypothetical of course, but you get the gist of it.

But like I said, do an evaluation on your relationship and go from there. That would be my advise to you.

In saying that, I will now wait like everyone else in this thread for Tonko to post. Cant wait to see this.

[Odon]

I'd like it noted I agree 100% with whats been said so far, I'm trying to prove a point to my now EX. That I'm not the only person who seems to think the idea of one is batshitcrazy.

[Mizango]

I'd like it noted I agree 100% with whats been said so far, I'm trying to prove a point to my now EX. That I'm not the only person who seems to think the idea of one is batshitcrazy.

Man that sucks. See when it is as one sided as it seems in this case, that is a bad sign. I guess it is indeed a good thing she is now your "Ex" before you or someone else got hurt.

[Izzy]

I'd like it noted I agree 100% with whats been said so far, I'm trying to prove a point to my now EX. That I'm not the only person who seems to think the idea of one is batshitcrazy.

Kick your ex in the cunt really hard for me.

Fucking women always complaining about men being the sluts...look at this ho.

[SephYuyX]

Tell her to enjoy her aids.

[sephir]

if your talking friends with benefits there isnt much of an issue as long as its mutually agreed upon.

[Tyche]

Nothing better than unattached sex. Tell her "sure" and fuck her while playing the field for better ass, then kick her to the curb. Unless you think you will get emotionally attached, then it could get ugly.

[Odon]

Nothing better than unattached sex. Tell her "sure" and fuck her while playing the field for better ass, then kick her to the curb. Unless you think you will get emotionally attached, then it could get ugly.

I am emotionally attached to her which is why I'm not doing the open relationship thing.