Prenuptial agreements

[Deejay]

So recently, I started dating this girl. In one of our many "get to know ya" conversations we somehow brought up prenuptial agreements and our stance on them. Now before I go on my little rant, I want to make clear where exactly I'm coming from...
My mother owns her own mortgage company, and she sells/renovates a lot of her own investment properties. My dad also throws in his salary to pay for the houses my mom invests on, so they both "own" the houses that they buy/sell.

Since I've turned 18, i've started working with her part time while I go to school. I'm going to start buying/selling my own properties soon that will be in my name.

Now back to the whole prenuptial agreement topic, because I do what I do(buy/sell properties), I think it'd be silly for me to not want to have one when/if I get married. Heavens forbid I get a divorce and have to split all of my properties 50/50 with my wife who had basically no say in it.

Is that selfish or just logical?

She thinks it's a prick move but respects me for being honest....

What does BG think?

[Lordwafik]

Logical. Unless she puts in her salary, then she has performed no effort therefore deserves nothing of it.

edit : think of prenup as an insurance policy.

[izembo]

Logical. Unless she puts in her salary, then she has performed no effort therefore deserves nothing of it.

that exactly ^

[Ivaden]

As often as divorce is nowadays, there's no way I would disagree with your situation (and probably disagree with prenups as a whole).

[Beckwin]

Don't marry a person if you'd think something bad would happen (yeah, shit happens though, but for the most part).

Otherwise set it up as a business somehow? idk

pre-nups are just kinda tacky and you can always just not get married too.

[Maxxthepenguin]

Logical, but dickish. It's a contingency plan for a relationship, more or less.

[Cephius]

Don't marry a person if you'd think something bad would happen (yeah, shit happens though, but for the most part).

Otherwise set it up as a business somehow? idk

pre-nups are just kinda tacky and you can always just not get married too.

I don't agree with this, you never know what will happen in the future. There's nothing wrong with pre-nups, they don't mean you don't trust each other, it's just an insurance policy incase things don't work out. If anything it shows more trust in a relationship because you're clearly showing you aren't about the wealth and are mature enough to separate peacefully should something happen.

[Tyche]

Don't marry a person if you'd think something bad would happen (yeah, shit happens though, but for the most part).

Otherwise set it up as a business somehow? idk

pre-nups are just kinda tacky and you can always just not get married too.

Agree with this

Been with my fiancee since we I was 16 and she was 15. There's really no need for a prenup in our case, half the shit is hers anyway. The house we own is in my name, mostly for credit reasons, but she still pays on it. I'm not sure on the legislation for real estate investment homes during a divorce, but I'm pretty damn sure that the banks and investment firms will make damn sure that she wouldn't get half the property you have stake in. I'm sure they have much better attorney's than she does.

[Kuya]

Better a prick than a fool.

[Keno]

So recently, I started dating this girl. In one of our many "get to know ya" conversations we somehow brought up prenuptial agreements and our stance on them. Now before I go on my little rant, I want to make clear where exactly I'm coming from...
My mother owns her own mortgage company, and she sells/renovates a lot of her own investment properties. My dad also throws in his salary to pay for the houses my mom invests on, so they both "own" the houses that they buy/sell.

Since I've turned 18, i've started working with her part time while I go to school. I'm going to start buying/selling my own properties soon that will be in my name.

Now back to the whole prenuptial agreement topic, because I do what I do(buy/sell properties), I think it'd be silly for me to not want to have one when/if I get married. Heavens forbid I get a divorce and have to split all of my properties 50/50 with my wife who had basically no say in it.

Is that selfish or just logical?

She thinks it's a prick move but respects me for being honest....

What does BG think?

Anything you bring into the marriage isn't split 50/50 if you get divorced. The only things that get split 50/50 are assets acquired during the marriage. So I guess if you don't think she'd be helping you with your work at all during your marriage then I'd say yeah, get a pre-nup. But if she's going to be contributing to your earning power (in terms of helping your business, not her career) as well then it would be kind of a dick move.

[Beckwin]

Better a prick than a fool.

strange of you to not back up the "just don't get married" angle

[Darus Grey]

I hardly see this as being a prick move.

It's a responsible choice to make, and I don't see how being foresightful is bad, that whole "if you loved me we wouldn't need one" argument goes both ways, if it's meant to last then the pre-nup is irrelevant because it never comes into play, and if they "loved you" they'd understand that you're a responsible cautious person.

People harping on the "power of love", don't marry her if she isn't "the one"...type BS don't live in the real world.


That said I think all Marriage is stupid... if you're gonna marry someone you should structure it as a civil contract, or as a NPO, or simply not do it at all and just live together under the pretense you're a married couple and treat it seriously.

Legal marriage has virtually no benefits except to reward the more worthless member of the union if there's a split.

[shihei]

Well what if your married for one day without a prenup, I mean isn't there some sort of time aspect that you must be married for stuff to be 50/50 in case of a split? I thought it was 10 years?

Either way I don't like the idea of getting one, it betrays the union of the couple imo.


Take my opinion for though, I always believe there is hidden meanings in everything and have never been in a serious relationship.

[Maxxthepenguin]

Legal marriage has virtually no benefits except to reward the more worthless member of the union if there's a split.

Use = income, rite?

No person is more useless than another in a relationship.

[Deejay]

Anything you bring into the marriage isn't split 50/50 if you get divorced. The only things that get split 50/50 are assets acquired during the marriage. So I guess if you don't think she'd be helping you with your work at all during your marriage then I'd say yeah, get a pre-nup. But if she's going to be contributing to your earning power (in terms of helping your business, not her career) as well then it would be kind of a dick move.

Well, if her salary paid for living expenses, that means I'm using our excess cash to invest on homes. Wouldn't that give her a legal leverage if we divorce after I acquired say 3 homes while we were married?

Edit: Well maybe I worded that wrong.

If my wife's income pays for the rent, food, cable, while I pay for the cars, food, entertaintment, couldn't she claim half of the money I make off of investment properties?

[Darus Grey]

Use = income, rite?

No person is more useless than another in a relationship.

Pretty sure I used worthless opposed to useless for a reason.

[Keno]

Anything you bring into the marriage isn't split 50/50 if you get divorced. The only things that get split 50/50 are assets acquired during the marriage. So I guess if you don't think she'd be helping you with your work at all during your marriage then I'd say yeah, get a pre-nup. But if she's going to be contributing to your earning power (in terms of helping your business, not her career) as well then it would be kind of a dick move.

Well, if her salary paid for living expenses, that means I'm using our excess cash to invest on homes. Wouldn't that give her a legal leverage if we divorce after I acquired say 3 homes while we were married?

Edit: Well maybe I worded that wrong.

If my wife's income pays for the rent, food, cable, while I pay for the cars, food, entertaintment, couldn't she claim half of the money I make off of investment properties?

Are these properties you acquired before or after the marriage? (hypothetically)

[Feedmenow]

The simple solution is to have her use money in your investments, so that if a divorce happens nobody is screwed. :ashira:

Use = income, rite?

No person is more useless than another in a relationship.

Pretty sure I used worthless opposed to useless for a reason.

If she's not working, then this would be valid. But wouldn't she be working in this situation?

[Keno]

The simple solution is to have her use money in your investments, so that if a divorce happens nobody is screwed. :ashira:

Use = income, rite?

No person is more useless than another in a relationship.

Pretty sure I used worthless opposed to useless for a reason.

If she's not working, then this would be valid. But wouldn't she be working in this situation?

Even if she isn't working she could still be contributing to the financial success of your investments merely by your union. Perhaps you wouldn't have chosen those same properties had you not been married, etc.

[Feedmenow]

The simple solution is to have her use money in your investments, so that if a divorce happens nobody is screwed. :ashira:

Use = income, rite?

No person is more useless than another in a relationship.

Pretty sure I used worthless opposed to useless for a reason.

If she's not working, then this would be valid. But wouldn't she be working in this situation?

Even if she isn't working she could still be contributing to the financial success of your investments merely by your union. Perhaps you wouldn't have chosen those same properties had you not been married, etc.

Goes both ways. Those "investments you would/wouldn't have chosen if you weren't married" could suck/rock, so that shouldn't be an issue, really.