Brother got his girlfriend prego, family hates him.

[Wakabo]

As the title says my brother got his girlfriend pregnant and everyone in my family is all against it but myself. I feel it's awesome to have a child of your own that you brought into this life. Everyone else is being all butt hurt over it and thinking he is idiotic for doing such a thing.

What is exactly wrong with it? He lives on his own with her and they are not married, but doesn't mean you need to have be married either. They are both happy about it as well.

Would you be happy for them or upset with them as well for getting her pregnant? Just baffles me that someone like family would react this way.

Edit: He's 21 april 8th, she's 18 almost 19. Him and mom have some beef together but everything seemed fine when we were fitting tux's for my other brother who is getting married. What ever back story you want let me know, don't know what exactly you're looking for.

edit2: Both he and I raised in a mormon family [you can lol now] till we both have moved out and mom knows she has no more children left that do what the church wants. If anything about being Mormon is a problem I don't see why since we haven't followed anything for a while now.

[Callisto]

Uhh you should maybe give a little more backstory there, lol. How old are they? Does he have a job? Does she have a nice set?

[Darus Grey]

It's pretty common.

If they announce they're getting married soon in the near-mid future, you'll understand why they hate her(and him as an extension).

Your family likely views her as an intruder forcing herself into the family by a likely unplanned(at least by him!) pregnancy.

Given your complete lack of details, the above is still a likely scenario I've seen played out dozens of times.

[kuronosan]

As the title says my brother got his girlfriend pregnant and everyone in my family is all against it but myself. I feel it's awesome to have a child of your own that you brought into this life. Everyone else is being all butt hurt over it and thinking he is idiotic for doing such a thing.

What is exactly wrong with it? He lives on his own with her and they are not married, but doesn't mean you need to have be married either. They are both happy about it as well.

Would you be happy for them or upset with them as well for getting her pregnant? Just baffles me that someone like family would react this way.

Your story leaves far too many elements out to judge whether this is a good thing or not.

[The_OG_Nelta]

If it wasn't an accident, fuck your family for hating him for such a stupid reason.

[Wakabo]

edited first post

[Wakabo]

If it wasn't an accident, fuck your family for hating him for such a stupid reason.

I want to say it was an accident but if it happened they were prepared for it and willing to accept it. Both of them seem very happy about it.

[kuronosan]

Well, unless he has a good-paying job this isn't really a good thing in the long term but it has potential for them to both learn something and grow closer and stronger as a result.

If they're both completely okay with it there shouldn't be a reason for your family to hate on him. It's his choice and her choice, not theirs.

Although to be honest, if I was the parent in this situation I would be angry too - no education or degree these days means you can kiss a good career goodbye. Hardly a good way to bring up a child, whether you're happy or not.

You're a good brother for standing up for him but a better brother would talk to him about what he's getting himself into.

[Wakabo]

Well, unless he has a good-paying job this isn't really a good thing in the long term but it has potential for them to both learn something and grow closer and stronger as a result.

If they're both completely okay with it there shouldn't be a reason for your family to hate on him. It's his choice and her choice, not theirs.

Although to be honest, if I was the parent in this situation I would be angry too - no education or degree these days means you can kiss a good career goodbye. Hardly a good way to bring up a child, whether you're happy or not.

You're a good brother for standing up for him but a better brother would talk to him about what he's getting himself into.

No I let him know that there is going to be a lot of beef with the family about this and what they think about it. He doesn't have the best paying job, she doesn't either. Both a little over Min. Wage. I know there are people he is living with and made friends with there that would be supportive of the two as well.

I'll throw this into first post too, but both he and I raised in a Mormon family [you can lol now] till we both have moved out and mom knows she has no more children left that do what the church wants. If anything about being Mormon is a problem I don't see why since we haven't followed anything for a while now.

[Cadsuane]

Should be in school, not contributing extra heads to the uneducated unskilled lower middle class with themselves and their child.

[Qalbert]

Why would they hate him over his choice of zesty marinara sauce?

[Wakabo]

Should be in school, not contributing to the uneducated unskilled lower middle class with themselves and their child.

I feel they should be too, but this is his choice and family just against them and do not want any part of it so far. Just doesn't seem right :3

[Max™]

Why would they hate him over his choice of zesty marinara sauce?

This is the right response.

[Callisto]

No I let him know that there is going to be a lot of beef with the family about this and what they think about it. He doesn't have the best paying job, she doesn't either. Both a little over Min. Wage.

This is where things get a bit different. Not to sound callous, but bringing a child into the world when they aren't in a financial position to give the child a decent shot at not having a suck-ass life isn't always a good thing.

The only way for it to work out well is to have a lot of family support, which means a lot of extra burden placed on the immediate family, which could be part of the reason that they are upset about it.

[Mayareira]

Mistake is a mistake, but hating is unreasonable.

[Cadsuane]

I feel they should be too, but this is his choice and family just against them and do not want any part of it so far. Just doesn't seem right :3

Maybe because they see a long succession of fuckups in the offing, probably necessitating financial support due to your brother's irresponsibility. Thing for him to do now is to get his ass a decent trade or a degree, and if your family's unwilling to help him do that then yeah, they're being assholes. I intuit from what you've said so far that he's not really about to do that, in which case your family sees a deadbeat in the making, and they're most likely correct.

[kuronosan]

No I let him know that there is going to be a lot of beef with the family about this and what they think about it. He doesn't have the best paying job, she doesn't either. Both a little over Min. Wage. I know there are people he is living with and made friends with there that would be supportive of the two as well.

I'll throw this into first post too, but both he and I raised in a Mormon family [you can lol now] till we both have moved out and mom knows she has no more children left that do what the church wants. If anything about being Mormon is a problem I don't see why since we haven't followed anything for a while now.

Well, this is a problem. Even if the people he is living with are supportive of them they are not going to help him raise the kid once it's born, trust me. He really needs to think about what this means and start working on some kind of career certification or degree before he goes under.

This is not going to end well, and you should trust your family's instincts. The fact that both make under $10/hr should tell you they are not financially capable enough to raise a child. I'm glad they're happy and all man, but you need to be the guy who opens your brother's eyes to the world of responsibility ahead. Children aren't cheap.

It's good to have supportive friends and family but at the end of the day they need to be responsible as parents. Not everyone else. This is part of the problem with people who aren't ready to be parents (which they are not) - they expect everyone else to help out and then totally forget THEY are supposed to be parents.

[Velgadess]

This is where things get a bit different. Not to sound callous, but bringing a child into the world when they aren't in a financial position to give the child a decent shot at not having a suck-ass life isn't always a good thing.

The only way for it to work out well is to have a lot of family support, which means a lot of extra burden placed on the immediate family, which could be part of the reason that they are upset about it.

^
This.

When you have a kid, its no longer about you. As for the family being pissed, what about the gf? You say she's barely 18? She has her entire life infront of her and is now a mom. Nothing wrong with that, some people like that. Did she have a future? School? Career?

Not saying its impossible but it makes it more difficult. So perhaps maybe thats why the family is upset.

[Ksandra]

families overreact. While that doesn't make it "right", it's not a surprise either. Families always have a hard time when things in life go in unexpected ways.

With that being said they are too young and too not financially responsible, so while they may be happy, this definitely wasn't a good time either so having the family be upset is again expected. Rather than being upset with your parents better to try and see it from both sides and try to reason with them.

[alt]

How long have they been together? Have they talked about getting married?