The whores and the Madonnas

[Lucienne]

The other day a friend of mine asked me what I do to meet nice guys. My relationships might not have been the most amazing ones, but I've never ran into married men looking for fun, violent, abusive guys or any other kind of obvious asshole that she gets to deal with on regular basis. We've been friends for a long time and it's always been this way. We're both about equally good looking, I'm a bit thinner than her, but not significantly, and we wear similarly revealing clothes.

Her question made me think of something I've heard long ago, that men either treat women as whores or as Madonnas.

My question for you guys is: Are you more likely to treat some women as sexual objects than other, and if so what is this based on?

[Rocl]

isn't Madonna a whore though?

[Milkster]

[Milkster]

What is it about her that attracts these types of men?

[Ryko]

isn't Madonna a whore though?

If she isn't, all that money is built on a lie.

[#686578]

All women are whores

[Lucienne]

isn't Madonna a whore though?

She might be a fallen saint, but that won't help my case here.

[Lucienne]

What is it about her that attracts these types of men?

Neither me nor her know, which is why I'm throwing it out as a general question. Who knows, maybe something will come out of it.

[Lucienne]

All women are whores

Does this mean you treat all women the same?

[Linliel]

The other day a friend of mine asked me what I do to meet nice guys. My relationships might not have been the most amazing ones, but I've never ran into married men looking for fun, violent, abusive guys or any other kind of obvious asshole that she gets to deal with on regular basis. We've been friends for a long time and it's always been this way. We're both about equally good looking, I'm a bit thinner than her, but not significantly, and we wear similarly revealing clothes.

Her question made me think of something I've heard long ago, that men either treat women as whores or as Madonnas.

My question for you guys is: Are you more likely to treat some women as sexual objects than other, and if so what is this based on?

Not a guy but maybe a) it's where she meets guys, b) it's to do with her relative (in)security, perhaps?

[Rocl]

did i meet this woman because i adequately assign whore status if so

[#686578]

Does this mean you treat all women the same?

Everyone except my mother

[Alleya]

My question for you guys is: Are you more likely to treat some women as sexual objects than other, and if so what is this based on?

Their behavior. If they act like a whore, I don't see any problem treating them like one. If they act like a respectable, intelligent human being, then I'll treat them like one. That said, the difference between men boils down to whether or not they're willing to treat a woman poorly or not. I'm not willing to treat others poorly, unless they're a shitty person. It takes a certain amount of introspection and self-assessment to make sure you're acting ethically and fairly towards other people, regardless of gender, and to keep your presumptions in check. That is where the disconnect happens. Some men (and women) aren't equipped to do that as well as some others.

So it's a mixture of faults with her and faults with the guys, imo, like all interpersonal problems. The best advice I think I can give to anyone looking for a relationship, male or female, is that you have to like yourself and know your own worth first and foremost, and be willing to stand up and fight to preserve that feeling.

[Lucienne]

Not a guy but maybe a) it's where she meets guys

We're in a same bar, both wearing a short dress and boots, I end up talking to a single Englishman that takes me out for dinner the next day, she'll get a married Norwegian businessman that keeps ordering free champagne and tries to get her to follow to his room.

Not a guy but maybe a) it's where she meets guys, b) it's to do with her relative (in)security, perhaps?

I can't say she's insecure, or overly secure.

[#686578]

Seriously I do treat every female exactly the same. I treat them exactly the same as I treat every male.

[Lucienne]

did i meet this woman because i adequately assign whore status if so

yes
I was hoping you might have some pointers actually.

[Milkster]

Is she as confident as you? Married men don't usually go after the confident women too much to deal with, etc.

Just because you both wear the same kind of outfit, you both could be sending two different vibes. You, Luci, could be saying I am confident with myself and my being and will flaunt it will still being reserved. While she may just be saying look my way.

[Rocl]

yes
I was hoping you might have some pointers actually.

ok so she works with you uhhh is she the blonde or the dark haired rather pudgy woman?

[Rocl]

i forget the names obviously, i met these people once and we got rather drunk. but the blonde had good english iirc? she studied in LA or something?

[Odon]

My question for you guys is: Are you more likely to treat some women as sexual objects than other, and if so what is this based on?

Depends on how they portray themselves, if they're an air-headed bimbo and it's obvious it's their mission in life is to take dick, then yeah totally. But if not, no. I'll treat them with respect and stuff.